Well where shall I begin. It's been a while since I've dragged my sorry arse to the Monday run and now that I did I'm glad. My day started by waking after spending the previous day in the TQ and other bars with lovely ladies spinning around in them. Not feeling the best I dragged myself down to sign up and off to the A site. Whilst on the bus I noticed a group of men who looked rather bi curious, they seemed to be a cross between men at work (due to the high viz waistcoats and gay disco dancers (due to their coloured glasses and head bands). They proceeded to sing a song about sticking things up the holy of holes and shouting "that's good" which I'm sure is a rule six offence. Still they seemed to be enjoying themselves. Once at the A site the GM called the circle and in with the new shoes. In my opinion the A site was of standard and that is to be secluded and free of dead dogs. Hares on in which were VV and Two Time. I've known VV for a few years and done quite a few of his runs before so I knew what to expect. The run was on its way and at this time I felt like I was going to blow up so I fell off the pace. I was glad to see Cabbage Head  and John Wardley (the runner) taking the front but that was the last thing I had to do with it. The run was well laid and nothing more to add except that King Yao Yao apparently had a problem with a local bull so he called in one of the ladies who went to work on the bull with a piece of grass and intern saved our king. Well by the time I got back there were hashers all over the place doing what hasher are good at which is drinking and telling stories. The Bi curious blokes were now full at it with Scandi hooligan at the helm still singing that song about holes and still shouting "that's good". I  then saw an old pal coming in (Flying Frog), looked a little damp and a little red. I must add that this is when I caught up with some old faces and it was great to see you all. Sir Airhead walked over and this is when I came up with cunning plan which was to keep him talking and to keep his mind off that piece of cardboard that he was writing on. He started to move on when I thought I had escaped. Well this be a warning to all you sinners that god does not forget and on the hash you can make up your own minds who that is. There I was once again in the head lights of justice after two years away as Sir Airhead came back to confirm my name on the Monday run. The circle was called and the hares back in. Good run declared. Then it was back to the Bi Curious blokes. I must say that you Scandi blokes are good for people like me. It used to be me throwing myself on the ice due to the many sins I used to commit daily with too many witnesses to record the facts. Well it was established that the Scandi's had been committing offences from pissing in the street and pissing off the police and then were warned by Sir Airhead that it was unwise to do the same to the local militia. As a few of us know this can be expensive and also very uncomfortable especially when they put you in that small box after they deem you unfit to share a cell after you have attacked some of  your other cell mates. Anyway the minute of reckoning was on me and it was time for me to grab a seat along with Fucking Dog and King Yao Yao. Fucking Dog for not liking helmets and Yao Yao for the bull incident. Myself well that was for just been me. I knew then I had returned and it was good to be back. Next in was Karamba a good friend of mine who has joined me on the ice numerous times usually trying to save my sorry arse and also committing lots of sins. This time it was for becoming the face of the hash due to his expensive teeth and also being a member of an old boys club but the less said about that the better. Chicken Fucker and Terminal 4 joined him. Where you see one you can bet the other is close by. A story about fuel gauges and no gas was to follow. The Bi curious lot were back in with two taking a seat for being proud and the others standing for been wise. Next in line was Poncho and V V this was due to Poncho being a day early for V Vs birthday. Now it was time for the returnees. Once this was out of the way I felt it was time to get back down there on the ice as I was called in to report on one of my friends Cabbage Head for been spotted in that bar where the guys in skirts hang out. There were questions to the strength of my evidence and once again Karamba came in to defend Cabbage Head and in turn rode more ice. Next in was John (the runner) for winning the Thai temple race and it was decided that he was a hash hero for the day. Lets get this guy named. Next in was a runner from Norway Arse-A-Holic for his 150th run mug and Spag Head for his 300th mug. Then it was back to business with Poncho being iced for abusing the GM. A young guy (the man with the broken leg) joined him, along with Karamba. This was due to the broken leg man standing up Ewok on a date. I must add at this point if she still needs someone for a date that I'm free most nights. Karamba's part in this was he came up with the excuse that the guy didn't show due to him breaking his legs which looked a little sus when he turns up the next Monday ready to run. Uncle Fester then stepped in as it was discovered that Ewok could see her errors for going for the younger guy and had decided to stick to the more experienced warrior. I-Da-Ho and Care Bear then came in to discuss false pregnancy and Chicken iced himself so he could get his hands on Nurse Dick and talk about vibrators. All said and done in came Peler for forgetting Oslo Fuckin' Ere's 150th run mug last week. Then on to a song from Seaman Stains and then onto the hash hymn. Back then to Patrick's for the On On and the food was great and all seemed to play by the rules by sitting and getting a drink first. Well this is the end to my little tale. Great to be back and see you all and thanks for another high point in my break in the land of grins. Remember one last thing if you sin you will ride.

On On
R.F.S.