Monday again and it’s off to town to catch the bus for the usual run & fun and to see what surprises this week brings us. Arriving at the last minute by motorcycle taxi as I all ways seem to do, the bus was packed with standing room only at the back, a good turn out.
Our newly re-elected GM Flying Frog was a hare this week with Fini The Faggot leaving the role of GM to Sir Chicken Fucker for the day. After sign up and a chat with fellow hashers the circle was called by Sir Chicken Fucker and new shoes were first order of the day, in strides the little loud Aussie in the Hammersley shirt who was making all the noise at the back of the bus with Arse-holeo in a pair of elasticized cowboy boots, a beer chang was quickly poured in the right boot, but this guy just wanted more so Sir Chicken Fucker filled his left with the beer that he had carried into the circle. The hare’s defined the run with white paper (not like Fini, must have forgotten his big stash of pink paper) red checks and rusty barbed wire, and off we went. Sand, lots of Sand with a dust cloud being quickly whipped up by the FRB’s wanting to get back for that first cold beer, half way through the run Scary Pussy had taken a tumble and whilst bending down to patch herself up along runs Sir Chicken Fucker  not looking were he is putting his feet as he was taking full advantage of the view of a fallen hasher and stumbles on the same obstacle, only through the experience of years of hashing and falling out of bars does he keep his footing. The run was around an air field and not a military one so no one was arrested for spying, even though a few of these runners should be for one reason or another but that’s another story.
After a few beers and some chat the circle was called by Sir Chicken Fucker and the raffle was held by the delightful Seaman Swallow with that confused Aussie not getting the concept of numbers on a ticket but escaping without ice for now.
Sir Airhead  takes the circle and iced the hares as expected but wants to know the story behind the cheap HHH signs for the A site but, as we are to find out later this is because last weeks hares had not bothered to pick them up after their run. The crowd decided that the hares had laid a good run so after a down down they are let off the ice. Next for the cold seat was Karamba to be given the Bad news that Derelick had once again missed his flight so would still require his room at Karamba’s JASMINE Hotel and would continue to scare off the rest of his customers. Arse-holeo was iced for Hash Trash, when will the bad man learn and that means anything.
T4 was iced for working as a mamasan for KT’s but this was just a cover so he could check them all out on the sly. (Still a Rule 6 T4)
Steamy Lump takes over the circle and iced Flying Frog & Karamba as this is the Frogs 10^th anniversary of his first run with the Pattaya H3 and presented them with a pair of welding goggles for the Flying Frog to sky dive in, and Karamba’s pink infra-red goggles made him look like Dame Edna and are named the crash brothers for the evening. Another one of Arse-holeo’s virgins is in the bucket for mobile abuse when at the circle. Back again on the ice is Arse-holeo and his 2 Aussie virgins as they have turned up in Hash shirts from foreign Hash’s to try and make them selves look like hard core hasher’s but it turns out they have borrowed them from the bad man himself and left their under pants to secure return of these shirts, Don’t think you will get those back lads we don’t call him the bad man for nothing.
Sir Chicken Fucker takes the circle again and deals with Arse-holeo and his 2 virgins again, anything for another beer and some attention those guys, I say again when will they learn.
Fini The Faggot gets a down down for having hared 30 runs, and King Yao Yao and Queen Stella on in to celebrate 30 years of marital bliss & battles with the Queen having not run today as she has been worn out by the King whilst having their own celebrations at home. On In.  Greg Smith the louder one of Arse-holeo’s virgins and a jockey by trade is iced and was named John Wayne by Sir Chicken Fucker; don’t know what happen to the vote there.
With the hares having not prepared a song for our entertainment one was provided by the master of music Seaman Stains followed by the hash hymn and the bus back to town.
The usual suspects also got iced through out the evening but they must have deserved it as we don’t do things with out cause.
The usual chat, jokes and songs on the bus was had by all except the newly named John Wayne as he spent most of the journey pukeing out the back door of the Hash bus, and with Arse-holeo’s other virgin Allan on hearing that the Pattaya Hash were heading to town for more beer decided he’d had enough and jumped from the bus on route. When will Arse-holeo learn?
A fine feast, more beers and a good chat with most of it civil was had by those hasher’s that turned up at Miss Chivas Bar who we all want to thank.
See you all for another adventure next week.

ON ON
Absolutely No Fucking Idea.