Scribe Report by Who Cut the Cheese
Today was the VV Sausage BBQ Run and the hares were VV and TWO TIME. This location had everything from lakes, fields, trees and cows to building sites and the distant aroma of the nearby rubbish tip to clear the nostrils. Wonderful stuff.
I personally can vouch that the run was clearly papered as this time we managed to get back before the circle had started for a change.
On completion of the run 86 hashers were welcomed back with assorted beverages, snacks and of course the option of the VV BBQ Sausage. Good stuff.
The Grand Master started the proceedings with the icing of the hares. All agreed both VV and TWO TIME had done a sterling job this run. Well Done.
Next up was SIR FREE WILLY and his Raffle. Can’t give you the names of the winners as my girlfriend kept pushing her tickets in my face at this time.
AIRHEAD up next and duly got the hares iced again. It was pointed out that it was TWO TIME who does all the work in this relationship and she even drives the beer truck. Having been furnished with this news some of the male Hashers had to enquire if she had a sister available?
Next to be iced was BILLION SUCKER and NECROPHILIA NIGHT RIDER. An interesting discussion on electronic sex was conducted including the pros and cons of such a hobby and the cost that it entails.
SIR WANDA and STUPID KRAUT KUNT iced next. It was pointed out that SIR WANDA had actually moved to Phuket many years ago when it was a one boat fishing village and single-handedly turned it into the successful resort it is today. An unbelievable achievement we all agreed.
Three virgins next up. (Well two actually as one had already pissed off). The remaining two didn’t really have much going for them either. First they were German and second they work with SKK. Poor Bastards.
Birthday time and VV was duly called out again to be iced and receive his cake. It was considerate for the girls to actually make it this time instead of just mixing the ingredients on his head. Unfortunately due to the amount of candles we all had to move back as the heat from them was giving us a sun tan.
WANK-KING’S WANKER circle and award ceremonies for their achievements. (See STATS below for the details).
LOVE BOAT, SUGAR DADDY and SIR WANDA all got an invite to take a seat and explain to the Hashes the consequences of being caught by the police while being slightly intoxicated. As it turns out 10,000 baht in cash.
The Grand Master brings in NO MORE CUM in to explain what happened to his pony tail? By all accounts the reason it was removed was due to the fact there have been too many female imposters trying to emulate and aspire to his fashion statement.
SCAR W/2TS takes the circle and rightly brings in the Germans. SKK and his two fellow work colleagues. This was followed by FINGERLESS proving to us all that he will drink anything that is put in front of him.
Grand Master calls DIRT LOONEY, THE WIZARD, WANK-KING’S WANKER, SKK, and GANGREEN for talking. Constructive abuse was duly handed out.
Nearing the end now and the Call on the Hares by REDCOAT. A fine song it was too.
It was only a matter of time but yet again we had to get the Germans back in to sing us a German song. Can’t say it was memorable but who really cares anyway?
Finally a big thanks to the hares for a fine day of hashing. A reminder to all to make sure you save all your tin opener tabs we are collecting for a very good cause.
The Hash’s Tahitian Queen was well attended as usual and a big thanks to EMPEROR AIRHEAD for the hot food awaiting our arrival. Much appreciated.
On-On! Who Cut the Cheese
Next week’s scribe is My Girlfriend Knows I’m Gay
Names are listed in alphabetical order and show Total Runs with the PH3.
Total Runners This Week – 86
Hashers Present Last Week – 57
3 Mark Penders; 12 ARSE BANDIT; 28 ARSE VAN HOLE; 72 BAHT BUS GESTAPO; 598 BALL RINGER; 381 BELL END; 119 BEN 10; 208 BILLION SUCKER; 109 CAMEL HUMPER; 101 DESERT SCORPION; 84 DIRT LOONEY; 315 DOESN’T TOUCH THE SIDES; 511 DUCHESS TADPOLE; 1391 EMPEROR AIRHEAD; 51 FINGERLESS; 169 FLYING FINN[ 149 FUZZY LURE; 627 G.I. JOE; 290 GANGREEN; 295 GERMAN SHEPHERD; 32 HARBOR WHORE; 126 HELIUM HEAD; 51 IM LAO; 193 JACKAL; 692 LADY FLIPPER; 335 LIBERACE; 65 LOVE BOAT; 20 MAYO QUEEN; 740 MRS. HEAD; 71 MY GIRLFRIEND KNOWS I’M GAY; 181 NECROPHILIA NIGHT RIDER; 208 NO MORE CUM; 398 ODD-JOB; 352 PELER; 25 PINK DOLPHIN; 81 PRINCESS BUM BOY; 39 RAT VON KIEL; 10 REAL OLD; 176 REDCOAT; 253 SCAR W/2TS; 687 SIR ARSE-A-HOLIC; 714 SIR FREE WILLY; 876 SIR SPAGHETTI HEAD; 25 SMOKEY TRUCKY FUCKY; 131 SPECIAL PRICE; 435 SQUEEZE MY TUBE; 222 STUPID KRAUT KUNT; 432 TAMPAX; 49 TELLY TUBBY; 36 THE WIZARD; 194 TWO TIME; 20 ULI’S GOOLIES; 47 UNSTABLE LOAD; 363 VELCRO DICK; 806 VIETNAMESE VIOLATOR; 324 WANK-KING’S WANKER; 24 WHORE IN THE WINDOW
Returners – 16
6 Wassana Songsop; 70 BANANAS; 201 BEVERLY HILLS PINK COCK; 26 BLACK DIAMOND; 6 BLACK WIDOW; 54 BORDERLINE; 54 CASPER; 45 CIA; 762 GENERAL KIDNEY WIPER; 59 LADY SNAKE; 123 PAPRIKA SMILEY; 45 SIR WANDA; 79 SPERM POLLUTER; 72 STREET CLEANER; 43 SUGAR DADDY; 207 TURD BURGLAR
Visitors (PH3 Total Runs) – 10
5 INIBRIO – Bangkok Hash, Thailand
1 TRIPLE J – Brisbane Hash, Australia
8 CHRISTOPHERCUMSEMEN – Chiang Mai Hash, Thailand
14 HANDYMAN Ludvika Hash, Sweden
1 INCOGNITO Ludvika Hash, Sweden
1 MEATBALL – Ludvika Hash, Sweden
1 Waraporn Noonil – Pattaya Jungle Hash, Thailand
17 BLACK DRAGON – Pattaya Jungle Hash, Thailand
4 WHO CUT THE CHEESE – Pattaya Jungle Hash, Thailand
1 Ann Bunwan – Unknown Hash
PINK DOLPHIN is now a full member having completed 25 runs with PH3.
Virgins – 3
Leavers – 0
~ none this week ~
Anniversaries – 4
TWO TIME was congratulated for her 20th Hared Run.
BEVERLY HILLS PINK COCK was awarded his 200th Run T-Shirt.
FINGERLESS was awarded his 50th Run Hat.
IM LAO was awarded her 50th Run T-Shirt.
Hash Name Events – 0
~ none this week ~
Saints and Sinners – 0
~ none this week ~
Happy Birthday ARSE VAN HOLE 19 March
Happy Birthday VIETNAMESE VIOLATOR 19 March