Pattaya H3

PH3 Run 1695 Scribe

Show Scribe Report by Vlad the Impaler

The Grand Master for the day was GENERAL KIDNEY WIPER who opened the pre-run circle by introducing 3 virgins and spotting 3 sets of new shoes who were christened in the usual manner by drinking beer from them. Apple got away with not drinking out of her shoes because she convinced the circle that she had drunk out of them on her last run, and that she had subsequently cleaned her shoes to look like new again.

We then set off on a 6 km run or 2 km walk through very scenic surroundings with views towards the coast. DEL BOY arrived after everyone had departed but still managed to finish with the front runners.

All runners returned and the second circle started soon after, with GENERAL KIDNEY WIPER immediately placing WANK-KING’S WANKER onto the ice for being over 6 feet tall and for insulting short people. The GENERAL asked GI JOE, BALL RINGER and RUNNING BARE if they liked the run, which they all did.

The circle was then handed over to SIR FREE WILLY who conducted the Raffle, which was won by TWO TIME, HARRY'S PINK CAMEL, LOST CAUSE and THE WIZARD, the star prize (hairy bikini pants) was won by Maxim Von Hove who was so impressed with this marvellous prize that he then wore the bikini pants for the remainder of the evening.

The GENERAL then took back the circle and ordered that all Kiwis take the ice, followed by ZENERGY because he couldn’t run because he was on crutches.

SIR FREE WILLY was then returned to the ice and was asked if he had a single cell when he was in the Bangkok Hilton, to which we replied yes, and then added that it was also shared with 270 other inmates, which raised a few smiles.

The 8 Belgians in attendance were placed on the ice and in the bucket, were asked to sing a Belgian song, but didn’t know any so they all had to drink a double down-down.

The virgins were then placed on the ice and SQUEAK was renamed to RAT VON KEIL.

The circle was handed over to that well-known Donald Trump supporter, WANK-KING’S WANKER who put LONE WOLF on the ice, who was joined by LOST CAUSE who was celebrating 100 Runs in just 2 years of membership to the PH3. FREE WILLY and TADPOLE, followed by SUGAR DADDY. TRY-A-FUCK were put in the bucket.

It was also LADY FLIPPER’s birthday and congratulations were passed on by all.

VLAD THE IMPALER was then put on the ice for being rude to Scottish people, and then returned to scribing duties.

"Sex is Boring" was then sung by the circle, followed by the Hash Hymn and the circle was then closed. The GENERAL was congratulated by many people for running such a great circle. The on-on bar was Nicky’s Bar, where the die-hards continued drinking.


On-On!  Vlad the Impaler

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