Pattaya H3

PH3 Run 1757 Scribe

Show Scribe Report by No More Cum

Well it didn’t take long for the seasoned stand-in GM GENERAL KIDNEY WIPER to realize that I’d only turned up for my second run since getting back to Sin City and was thus ripe for scribe duty.

The run itself, set by DUCHESS TADPOLE, SQUEEZE MY TUBE, TELLY TUBBY and BELL END was a flat 7.5 km runners’ run in a relatively semi-urban environment close to Maprachan Reservoir. I was outstanding following my return to duties as an FRB and must have been one of the first half dozen back.

What is a relatively low turnout these days once again had VV’s delicious baguettes to savour on their return, following the sausage jamboree of the previous week.

A minute’s silence was observed to honour the memories of all the armed servicemen of every nation, who had laid down their lives for a cause in war. This was jointly conducted by GKW and LONE WOLF.

In accordance with tradition, the hares were the first to be scrutinized by GKW, at the commencement of normal proceedings. As well as being commended for setting a fine run, their floral headgear was acknowledged to be in keeping with the festive theme of the run.

The Raffle, presented by SIR FREE WILLY, offered the usual array of prizes. The most notable choices of prize were made by NECROPHILIA NIGHT RIDER, who went home with some technical version of a mop and REAR GUNNER, who snaffled up the Toblerone chocolate kindly donated by BLACK JUSTICE. The clock, with an image of our recently passed King, was alas the last item to be claimed.

Once EMPEROR AIRHEAD had complemented the hares, without dribbling on DT, the competition for the finest traditional costume began and concluded with what appeared to be the participants sharing prizes in the form of bottles of Mekong. The hares minus TELLY TUBBY had been joined by PINKABOO. Next came an even more confusing judgement on who had made the best kratong.

It all seemed to move the evening along though and while the girls went down to the water’s edge to test the seaworthiness of the said vessels, GKW sat NNR down to quiz him on his recent antics and general behavior.

The stand-in GM also condemned SIR REALLY SADISTIC BASTARD, SIMONE EBOLA and GANGREEN to the ice for a reason, which escaped me.

EMPEROR AIRHEAD wasn’t finished. He singled out PAPRIKA SMILEY, our much-travelled hasher and pointed out the fact the danger was like a magnet to him. His most recent destinations include Iran, the DMZ in Korea and Egypt, while the Philippines is lined up for the future.

Next it was time for today’s scribe, a most loveable person, to enter the ring. NO MORE CUM promptly sat LONE WOLF, PHANTOM, BLACK JUSTICE and a confused HAVE TO STOP on the ice. The latter was unsure of his hash status on the day and was eventually deemed to be a visitor and was reminded that the scribe’s chair was for the scribe and “borrowing” it was not advisable, especially when the scribe is an RA.

LONE WOLF was deemed unrepentant by a discerning circle and judged to require further penance before his “Hash Trash” status is removed. Geography was the next subject, when the circle was made aware of BLACK JUSTICE’s floating lifestyle on the Bodensee (Lake Constance), an expanse of water shared by 3 different countries.

The aptly named PHANTOM has it seems now drifted silently away from the actual run into that shady undefined world of Beer Hunting. Will he ever be the same again? NMC finally iced the only two loveable fellows from the PH3, GI JOE and SPERM POLLUTER. They were joined by the feuding PAPRIKA SMILEY and ARSE BANDIT, the former having wrongly presumed that his temporary rent in Pattaya was safe from the predatory instincts of the latter.

We were treated to the dulcet tones of SRSB singing a rude song, while the ice was populated by the likes of NNR, SE and RG. This was then followed up by GKW singing the "Sex is Boring” song for the hares, which we were all encouraged to participate in. I thought Moira Anderson would be on next.

I hope everyone had as good a time as me and would like to thank all those hashers, who put in that extra bit of effort to clear up at the end and also The Blue Heeler, who made us very welcome again, once we got back into town.

On-On!  No More Cum

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