Pattaya H3

PH3 Run 1758 Scribe

Show Scribe Report by Shithead

Hares the DISORDERS, MENTAL and MENSTRUAL, BALL RINGER (Yes, the man with the golden cock!), BELL END and Ben 10. Return to Pattaya for MENTAL after 6 months away, hadn’t reccied or laid trail, but was happy to ride on BALL RINGER’s coat tails.

Two trails, walkers blue and runners red. NB: No Beer Hunters because Jimmie couldn’t get enough starters. BALL RINGER gave elaborate instructions but still had to run after walkers to mention something he had forgotten.

Flat walk in the palm plantation, some Tapioca crops. No water crossing or serious shiggy. Easy enough 5 km, rated “wonderful” by GI JOE. Somehow GENERAL KIDNEY WIPER logged up 10 km on his GPS. Positive rating from BOB-A-GOB. Strange comments from Smiling Norwegian about asphalt, splits and mergers. Go figure. Finally some wisdom from Belgium - “Too much trees”.

SIR FREE WILLY’s Raffle, just about all prizes won by Belgians. Talk about the mouse that roared! Top prize an electric jug, others included the usual booze and an unwanted promo T-shirt for Pan-Asia 2019 in China. FREE WILLY, only about 1800 years behind, called it as two hundred and nineteen. Winners, among others, were Papparazzi and Cookie Monster.

MENTAL put SCAR W2T's on ice. Drank a lot of whisky the day before having made marital vows at what must have been the wedding of the century.

Over to EMPEROR AIRHEAD. Hares on ice. BALL RINGER the shoulder to the wheel type, MENTAL the more flamboyant guy who hitch hiked through Afghanistan for his honeymoon. (“Cheap Charlie”). Belgians singled out for special treatment, three in the bucket other seven on ice. SCAR song “Swing a Hot Potato Up Your Arse, Hey Skol”. AIRHEAD complimented the Belgians on their alacrity in obeying orders. They’ll be singing in Flemish next week, stay tuned!

Back to WANK-KING'S WANKER, 50 Runs recognition to CHICKEN DUNDEE and PINK DOLPHIN (in absentia). VV complimented on 160 Hared Runs if you can believe it. Also instituting a green recycling system. Put your cans in the right receptacle you bastards!

THE WIZARD urges patronage of the ragsman’s little shop. Surely “Emporium” would be more like it! Self congratulation to Pattaya Hash for the best harriettes, kitoys, circle, songs and ragsman. Some recent trail FREE WILLY was feeling poorly. Would NO MORE CUM have given him the kiss of life? “Nah I’d have left him.”

PEDO PETE deserves mention for the lamest note ever!

Back to the wedding of the century. NO MORE CUM driving home ably assisted by GPS directions with supplementary, sometimes contradictory, instructions from the back seat. Thanks MENSTRUAL DISORDER!

Recap on inter-Mekong, attendees on ice. CRAPPER said MAD COW’s prelube was better than the event itself. GOLDEN RIVET nailed for coffee smuggling.

NO MORE CUM’s turn. LONE WOLF, TWINKLE DICK and others on ice. LONE WOLF keeps the hash beach hat. Very fetching! PHANTOM gets to drink out of his new shoes. If you are wearing new shoes, own up before the run! Beer out of new shoes tastes less vile before 10 sweaty kilometres.

Quote from The Wedding “Will you be starting a family?” “No plans but we’ll keep trying”.

Back to THE WIZARD. UNSTABLE LOAD on ice. The Flemish DIRT LOONEY, won’t stop yakking. MENTAL on ice, thought a scruffy hash singlet was appropriate attire for The Wedding. ARSE BANDIT on ice. Got lost in Suvanaket, comes home and surrenders his personal autonomy to a woman “she’s in charge”. NO MORE CUM laments SCAR's married the wrong bloke. “Should have been me”. Also identified as the lettuce muncher after the swamp run.

BEN 10 leads the Hash Hymn. Bucket damaged by too many Belgians. Special levy of 50 Baht for replacement bucket next week on everyone bar this week’s scribe.

On-On!  Shithead

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