PH3 Run 1761 Scribe
Show Scribe Report by Sperm Polluter
A scenic setting for today's run right beside the lake, the calm and tranquility was truly beautiful. Okay enough of the bullshit lets get on with the report. It was SCAR and BELL STAR wedding run with the help of MENTAL and MENSTRUAL DISORDER, what a combination, in fact MENTAL DISORDER hadn't hared a run for at least 10 days or so.
After the usual preliminaries we set off on the run, quite a flat run without any elevation challenges, a little over 7 kms, just about right for a Monday. The run opinion was a "good run", except for the Beer Hunters who were disappointed there was not a local watering hole to be found. Good to see DIRT LOONEY back, although I did hear him before I saw him.
SEAL SUCKER will be doing a Live Hare Run soon with RUNNING BARE, he informed us that if anyone catches up with them they will receive a prize, 1/2 hour in the bucket, not much incentive there then.
So, THE WIZARD is the stand in GM for the day, and introduced SIR FREE WILLY to conduct his infamous Raffle....... and the winners are...... CASPER, GENERAL KIDNEY WIPER, TELLY TUBBY x 2, FUZZY LURE, HARBOR WHORE, TOSSA, HOME BREW, RATSO EEL SNIFFER and POL DANCER, well done to all the winners.
THE WIZARD informed everyone of his recent motorcycle accident and how his life flashed before him, one thing came back to him was when he had a drinking problem several years ago, he would drink anything and one day goes into the local hardware shop for a bottle of Meths, the shop owner promptly dismissed him because he knew of his love for anything that would get him intoxicated, but THE WIZARD said he'd gotten over that and was a reformed character and he genuinely need the Meths for some work he was involved in. The shop owner believed him and said ok, so THE WIZARD said "thanks, can you do me a favour and make it a cold one" chuckle chuckle.
LONE WOLF was iced for not caring that THE WIZARD fell off his bike.
EMPEROR AIRHEAD takes over the circle and promptly ices the hares, he informed the hares that they need to give out whiskey if they want to achieve an excellent run opinion, something for all future hares to think about.
EA tells the circle about his new found fascination with Lobsters and that he has built up a Lobster Ranch to love and nurture the little critters.
The newlyweds are iced and EA wants to know where's all the decorations seeing as it's their wedding run, "no have" BELL STAR said, EA replied "well it's a good job I brought my own" and promptly adorns the newlyweds with tinsel.
LORD CHICKEN FUCKER is iced and EA tells the story about getting his son (James) a "Mom for the Day", and ended up with Betty who was so big needed a motorcycle helmet with 7 chinstraps. Nowadays LCF can be found in the Windmill Club drinking 60 baht draft beers where everyone gets naked, including LCF....
Orlando is iced and described as an " independent and incognito" Belgian, who grew up on a dredging boat and now spends his days going on long bike rides. He rides to the North, he rides to the South, he rides to the East, but he never goes West because that's where his wife comes from. He is then named " WHAT'S YOUR PROBLEM" with a unanimous vote from the circle.
MENTAL DISORDER takes the circle and asks why ARSE BANDIT's girlfriend won't return the black cock she won in the Raffle (twice), I think we all know why.
WANK-KING'S WANKER does the awards and introduced SPERM POLLUTER who has completed 100 runs, hooray.
WINDOW WANKER ices the newlyweds and gives them a photo as a memento of when SCAR had his accident and informed us that his wife and BELL STAR are brothers, "Oh My Buddha".
LORD CHICKEN FUCKER entertains the circle as usual, talking about ET phone home, ROBBING BASTARD the Tax Man and something about "saving the Turkeys" this Christmas.
At this point in the proceedings NO MORE CUM farts in the scribes face much to his annoyance, dirty kraut bar steward. LCF ices NMC, and tells everyone that when NMC goes back to the UK he will stay at his house, and asks if "Slasher" will be there? It's actually Sasha and the daughter of NMC, so be careful LCF. All the Belgians were put on the ice because it's SIR FROG's birthday.
We call on the hares to sing us a song but they didn't have a song so LCF did it for them, can't remember what it was now but it was funny as usual. Hash Hymn and off to the On On bar, which was the Blue Heeler where they kindly put on some food for the hashers, thank you.
On-On! Sperm Polluter