Pattaya H3

PH3 Run 1811
The Loy Krathong Run
Monday, November 19th 2018

Hares:
Duchess Tadpole, Lost Cause, Miss Use Me, Pocket Socket, Telly Tubby, Bell End and Hoi Wan
Map to Run 1811 A-Site
Scribe:   General Kidney Wiper
Hash Flash:   Lone Wolf
Runners:   87
On-On Bar:  Nicky's Bar
GPS:   12°52'54.39"N   100°59'10.56"E
Download Google Earth .kmz fileSoi Polo 1 – near The Polo Club (right side)
krathong-120Hares:
Duchess Tadpole, Lost Cause, Miss Use Me, Pocket Socket, Telly Tubby, Bell End and Hoi Wan
Scribe:   General Kidney Wiper
Hash Flash:   Lone Wolf
Runners:   87
On-On Bar:  Nicky's Bar
GPS:   12°52'54.39"N   100°59'10.56"E
Map to Run 1811 A-Site
Soi Polo 1 – near The Polo Club (right side)
Download Google Earth .kmz file

79 Run Photos This Week

Show the Thumbnails

Show Scribe Report by General Kidney Wiper


"What the hell happened?" I woke up in my own bed. In my own room. The wife was snoring next to me. So why do I feel so apprehensive and that there is something seriously amiss? Okay, go to the kitchen. Make a coffee. Look outside and see the car is there. No obvious new dents or scrapes. My two dogs, Pluto and Snoopy, have not done a runner out the gate and look like they still love me. Okay, they are hungry and love anybody that feeds them. Still I have a nagging feeling that I fucked up.

Okay time to sit down and chill. This is when I see a scrap of paper on the table. Oh shit no!!! "You are hash scribe" is written in my best drunken scribble. Now I remember. I AM HASH SCRIBE!!!

Did you know that the World Health Organization listed the three top most stressful things that can happen to you are.

  1. Going through a divorce.
  2. Moving house.
  3. Being a Hash scribe.

I took no notes because of the rampant rain. So they would have just been a soggy mass. Mind you, I know from past experience, that the Hibernian hieroglyphics I have penned are usually undecipherable and that there is no Rosetta Stone to help me out. No, not that girl from the Bangkok harriettes. I diverse, so here goes.

The run had a great A-site. Albeit three hundred metres from the location given in the Hash web page Google Earth link. The hares were DUCHESS TADPOLE, LOST CAUSE, MISS USE ME, POCKET SOCKET, TELLY TUBBY, BELL END, HOI WAN and LADY FLIPPER.

The reason it is an all female hare line-up is because it is the Loy Krathong Run. This is the time of year to float a "Krathong", which is to get rid of the bad shit and hope for a better year ahead. Nothing to do with getting rid of the girls, but because it is great to see them dressed up in traditional Thai costumes.

The precise origin of Loy Krathong is unclear, but it is widely believed to have originated in the ancient Thai capital of Sukhothai during the 13th or 14th century. The festival may have Brahmin origins but has been given a typically unique Thai twist over the years. This might be crap, but who cares.

The girls briefed us on the trail markings and we were off, with slight thunder heard in the distance. I decided to walk, as the leg muscles are suffering a bit, and was amazed at the number of actual walkers. What I did notice about them is two things. They never follow paper or shout on on.

This became apparent as the majority wandered off after losing paper about two kilometres out. The only effort to stay on track was by ANTIQUE, CHERRY BLOSSOM, SAMBA LA BAMBA and myself. We found what we assumed was the split for the runners and walkers, but was just a jumble of coloured sticks. Plenty of quad and scramble bikers running around out there, so maybe they ran over them.

We followed paper, but then it branched right, but VIOS and another girl said they were on paper. So, foregoing "COMMON SENSE", we followed the girls, even though we did not see paper immediately in front, but much further ahead, which ran in two directions. I now know this was the runner's trail on in. Anyway, I was back in about an hour and had covered just under five kilometres.

Arriving at the A-site, the girls were preparing food and glamming themselves up in Thai traditional costumes. Just managed to change into dry clothes, when HARBOUR QUCKSTART came sprinting in, closely followed by SPEEDO PETE and BEETROOT HEAD. They had clocked about eight and a half kilometres.

At this juncture in time, the weather was definitely taking a turn for the worse. The sky had perceptively darkened and there was light drizzle. The girls then served up some food that they had sponsored themselves. Looking at everyone munching away, and not much talking, it must have been fine fare.

Just after this, when I was getting a beer from the truck, GI JOE inquired how my leg was doing, when LOST CAUSE, who obviously had misread the instructions on "how to dismantle a table", managed to collapse it against said leg that GI JOE was asking about. This is the same girl who has looked after my cut legs on previous runs. She did say "SOLLY" and I did reply, "IT WAS ALLIGHT".

Now about this time the weather took a real turn for the worse. What had been heavy rain, soon became a torrential downpour, and the circle was quickly called to order.

The GM MENTAL DISORDER brought the hares in and they sat on the ice, still smiling, with their beautiful traditional dresses on, in the pouring rain. It was deemed a good run, but seemingly there were still some runners missing. SIR FREE WILLY, was then called in to do the raffle, but he was also AWOL.

By now the rain was really pissing down and I think if it had been a normal run, most would have buggered off, but because it was a Loy Krathong run, with prizes, and a enormous effort by the hares, proceedings progressed.

EMPEROR AIRHEAD took over the circle and judged the best Loy Krathong. Many great eco designed efforts. There was a winner, obviously, but cannot remember. Time to light them and float them in the lake beside the A-site.

Earlier we had been informed that there would be segregation on the baht buses, for smokers and non smokers. Well I think all the smokers had gone already, as we had trouble finding someone with a lighter. Also with the ensuing wind blowing in the wrong direction, they took a bit of launching.

Anyway, that out the way, it was time for the best costume. As this was decided by the verbal volume of the cheering, so began a process of elimination. The decibel dilemma was, the same people cheered similarly, each time for different costumes, without any obvious winner, or discernible decibel difference. Finally I think this was won by CASPER and DUCHESS TADPOLE.

Somehow, LONE WOLF managed to take some photos of the proceedings. I tried, but all I managed was a blurred picture of my finger. I blame RSB, as he was my wingman and I had to get him to show me where the camera app was on my phone. Blind leading the blind comes to mind.

Somehow SIR FREE WILLY re-appeared and was able to conduct the raffle. All prizes went quickly, during the bucketing rain, except for the cuddly toy "Nemo Fish." The way the rain was now coming down, you could have expected it to float away.

Talking of cuddly toys, it was at that juncture in time when LORD CHICKEN FUCKER and BALL RINGER arrived back from the run. Not sure if they thought it was a good run or not. (Oh Yeah!) How they made it back in the dark, only they know.

Up until this moment in time I had been matching Sir Really Sadistic Bastard beer for beer, but now the amber nectar was taking its toll. I do remember WANK-KING'S WANKER congratulating BELL END for haring ten runs.

SPERM POLLUTER running the circle like a crazed drugged Dervish on speed, icing anything that moved, with bulging bare buttock flesh smothering the burdened blocks of ice.

THE WIZARD doing a stint. (I think) Running the circle, not on the ice. The Hares dancing around and singing to the Loy Krathong song. Hash Hymn and then we were off.

Of course another great hash. Do we ever have a bad one? There was a lot more that happened, I know, but have not got a clue. Sorry if I did not mention you. Happy Hour was at Nicky's Bar. I did not go, but I am sure that as usual they would have looked after us well.

I hope the other 86 runners had as good a time as I had today.
Another great Hash.

On-On!  General Kidney Wiper


Show Run 1811 Stats Report

Total Hashers This Week - 87

Hashers Present Last Week - 59

2 Phillip Rossey; 163 ANTIQUE; 673 BALL RINGER; 79 BEETROOT HEAD; 454 BELL END; 192 BEN 10; 40 BLACK JUSTICE; 172 BURL IVES; 46 CANNONBALL; 8 CHERRY BLOSSOM; 172 CRAPPER; 164 DIRT LOONEY; 583 DUCHESS TADPOLE; 1464 EMPEROR AIRHEAD; 12 FLAMINGO BUTT PLUG; 180 FLYING FINN; 706 G.I. JOE; 372 GANGREEN; 842 GENERAL KIDNEY WIPER; 52 GING GANG GOOLIES; 167 GOLDEN RIVET; 37 GOOSEY GOOSEY GOBBLER; 90 HARBOR WHORE; 64 HOI WAN; 13 HURTS HER VAGINA; 772 LADY FLIPPER; 419 LIBERACE; 497 LONE WOLF; 1113 LORD CHICKEN FUCKER; 198 LOST CAUSE; 100 LOVE BOAT; 97 MAYO QUEEN; 238 MENTAL DISORDER; 171 MISS USE ME; 18 MOHAMMED THE SMILING NORWEGIAN; 256 NECROPHILIA NIGHT RIDER; 241 NO MORE CUM; 153 PAPRIKA SMILEY; 34 PAROU PAROU; 125 PHANTOM; 123 POCKET SOCKET; 145 PRINCESS BUM BOY; 112 RAT VON KIEL; 19 REAL OLD; 43 SHE'S THE BOSS; 114 SIMONE EBOLA; 794 SIR FREE WILLY; 799 SIR REALLY SADISTIC BASTARD; 32 SPEEDO PETE; 208 STEPTOE; 480 TAMPAX; 106 TELLY TUBBY; 118 THE WIZARD; 18 TICKLE ME PINK; 165 TINY ANAL TORPEDO; 263 TWO TIME; 414 VELCRO DICK; 409 WANK-KING'S WANKER; 69 WHORE IN THE WINDOW;

Returners - 18

64 ARSE BANDIT; 56 BOB SNOT HERE; 101 CASPER; 44 CROW FUCKER; 493 EWOK; 38 HAPPY SURVIVOR; 37 HARBOR QUICKSTART; 66 IRREGULAR PERIOD; 506 LADY SQUEEZE MY TUBE; 106 MASTER CHEF; 65 MR CHEAP; 106 SHIT ON MY SHIRT; 33 SLEAZY; 128 SPERM POLLUTER; 70 SUPA DICK; 122 UNSTABLE LOAD; 887 VIETNAMESE VIOLATOR; 32 VIOS;

Visitors - 8

7 Wachiraphon Khansanthia - Angeles City Hash, Philippines
11 SAMBA LA BAMBA - Angeles City Hash, Philippines
4 BLING - Desert H3, Dubai, UAE
15 FRENCH KISS - Pattaya Bush Hash, Thailand
17 SOUR KRAUT BONE COLLECTOR - Pattaya Bush Hash, Thailand
1 Mato Gruden - Pattaya Jungle Hash, Thailand
1 Niko Krhlakar - Pattaya Jungle Hash, Thailand
3 Sirintha Khamraeng - Unknown Hash

Virgins - 3

Dave Davis; Frank Marteaux; Michael Nathsdale;

Leavers - 1

MENTAL DISORDER;

Anniversaries - 4

BELL END was congratulated for 10 Hared Runs.
LOVE BOAT was congratulated for completing 100 Runs.
CASPER was awarded her 100th Run T-Shirt.
TELLY TUBBY was awarded her 100th Run T-Shirt'

Hash Naming Events - 0

~ none this week ~

Saints and Sinners - 0

~ none this week ~

Birthdays - 2

Happy Birthday EMPEROR AIRHEAD - 22 November
Happy Birthday G.I. JOE - 18 November