Pattaya H3

PH3 Run 1869 Scribe

Show Scribe Report by Steptoe

Hello to the New Year a little early, THE WIZARD greets the virgins including Gabor from Hungary inducing an orgasm in PAPRIKA SMILEY and the pack is off. Comments from the Hash intelligentsia DIRT LOONEY ‘it was up and down with emotional hills’, ROCKY ‘there were trees’, WINDOW WANKER ‘Lots of back checks at the beginning followed by a flat section and woods’, PAPRIKA SMILEY ‘pack together with clever checks', LOVE BOAT ‘flat out, steep towards the end, easy, nice’, GI JOE ‘great run’, FUCK OFF ‘very good trail’, KARAMBA 'nice terrain’, Gabor ‘no like forest’ .

Meanwhile the Beer Hunters consisting of NO CUNT TROLL, ARSE VAN HOLE, WANK-KING’S WANKER, CIA, STEPTOE and REALLY SADISTIC BASTARD were discussing the meaning of life and trying to pronounce WANK-KING’S WANKER’s new word ‘obsequious’. Is this self descriptive?


THE WIZARD ices NO TRUCKIN' IDEA for conveniently claiming Hash Trash of folding chair and sunglasses. Further ices JACKAL and PHONEY CUNT for Hash Crash both award, JACKAL in line for lifetime service award in this category. Further still, ices hares GING GANG GOOLIES, SHE’S THE BOSS, HAPPY SURVIVOR, BONE COLLECTOR, and SAUSAGE HEAD just for fun and tradition.


Lucky winners are: NO MORE CUM white wine, LEG OVER teddy bear awww..., Laurie Pope towel, ATOMIC MUFF DIVER coffee percolator, NO CUNT TROLL booze, BALL RINGER biscuits, NUTCRACKER shaver (no more hairy pussy), crack bum bag, LOVE BOAT ladies bag.

EMPEROR AIRHEAD ices the hares below a ‘romantic Venus under the moon’ duh!! It seems GING GANG GOOLIES is tolerated, SHE’S THE BOSS and HAPPY SURVIVOR are a team, SAUSAGE HEAD has an appropriate name and BONE COLLECTOR is well..., BONE COLLECTOR. Further ices NECROPHILIA NIGHT RIDER for his evolution in the girlie stakes from take out at the TQ to online Troll.

Initially being seduced into travelling domestic to ‘Nakorn Nowhere’ to meet a girl that didn’t exist, thru inducements to visit Ukraine organ donor centre to meet girl? And finally Chinese Tai Tai offering to pay everything just turn up in China duh!!!!! No show in eight days but texts imploring to stay a little longer. Sounds like some of the scams we used to inflict upon friends in our youth, come on who’s responsible?

Next ices STEAMY LUMP ex RA visiting without Bullshit Meter, PHANTOM being domesticated by KNICKERLESS seems he can cook no more eating raw meat unless in bed, SCARLET flown in from Oz to see if the rumours are true “PHANTOM is hitched OMG!!!

Next NO CUNT TROLL threw wild birthday party all are wasted and she lost a nail so presumably hanging a bit lopsided on the cross nowadays, CIA forgot birthday cake. Continues to ice SAMURAI H3 and OKINAWA H3 members SLAP, SQUEALS LIKE A PIG, SNUCK OFF and BI CURIOUS GEORGE for brotherly love. It seems Okinawa is Jungle and Samurai is pussy....

WANK-KING’S WANKER presents SAUSAGE HEAD with 5 hare shirt and HAPPY SURVIVOR with a hug.

Wanker of the Week award: THE WIZARD ices GI JOE for calling HAPPY SURVIVOR ‘a bitch’, also MADAM SIN last week Wanker of the Week for throwing shoes out of moving baht bus now in running this week for throwing drink out of moving baht bus that didn’t travel further than SGT LONE WOLF, also ARSE BANDIT for being MADAM SIN’s owner. MADAM SIN clear winner.


(1) Worst Down Down Song, ices all Belgians for not learning a song ever. ARSE VAN HOLE eases the tension a bit by actually sing a song, too late UNSTABLE LOAD is award as spiritual leader of Belgians. (2) Wanker of the Year, ices ARSE BANDIT winner of Wanker of the Week 7 times with four honourable mentions. (3) Biggest Fuck Up in Circle, WANK-KING’S WANKER clear winner. (4) What’s His Name when referring to hashers no longer present, nominated MENTAL DISORDER and WANK-KING’S WANKER who receives second award. WANK-KING’S WANKER is award Supreme Disrupter in Circle Award for winning two categories.

SCAR W/2T’S ices NO CUNT TROLL for being extremely pissed last week and missing the departing baht buses awards Wolf Head Mask so she will be noticed and thrown onto bus in coming weeks. BONE COLLECTOR iced as Hash Hero for rescuing NO CUNT TROLL and chasing after baht buses to make a deposit. Ices virgins for no shirt and doing well. Buckets GING GANG GOOLIES for acting tough ‘no food two days, no water one day’ and wimping out on trail as hill to steep. Also ices THE WIZARD for opinion trail was ok when it was in fact to narrow to pass at the beginning.

THE WIZARD thanks Nina as Hash Flash.

Hares sing GING GANG GOOLIES is not normal:
Ging Gang Goolies is sub-normal it is true, it is true
Put him on the ice now, put him on the ice now
In the bucket too, in the bucket too

On-On!  Steptoe

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