Pattaya H3

PH3 Run 1873 Scribe

Show Scribe Report by Absolutely No Fucking Idea


Well it's that time of year again for the PH3 Hashaholic’s Annual General Piss Up Run 2020. This year’s hares are the current GM THE WIZARD and his loyal side kick SPERM POLLUTER.

Arriving at the A site there was not much shade to be had but a good turnout of Hashers. After a brief time to chat the 1st circle was called and we were informed that today's GM was to be held by the joint at the hip RA’s of SCAR W/2TS and his noisy sidearm NO MORE CUM.

New shoes were dealt with in the usual fashion and then the Virgins, most of who came from Slovenia, an international incident was narrowly avoided due to the Slovene Partisans not speaking much English or German and NO MORE CUM not being very funny.

The hares informed the us of the trails and off we went, first part of the trail seemed like it was No Man’s Land between the Great War trenches, but all got across safely and bayonets were not needed at the far side.

On returning to the A site cold beers and a chat were plentiful until the 2nd circle was noisily shouted and SCAR W/2TS started with hares on ice for the review of the run, after asking many hasher their opinion G.I. JOE summing it up with a pretty damn good trail considering who the hares were.

Next its WANK-KING'S WANKER for a few awards, both HAPPY SURVIVOR and SAUSAGE HEAD for 5 Hared Runs, then BELL END for 500 runs, ARSE BANDIT for 100 runs and SIR ARSE-A-HOLIC for 20 hares, new shirts to all and well done all of you.

Then it was DIRT LOONEY who was called into the circle to explain the PH3 Website Stats had been updated, apparently WANK-KING'S WANKER could not find the “ANY KEY” on his computer.

THE WIZARD took the circle to bring in the PH3 Committee to thank them all for services from the past years and for the following year to come, so a thanks goes to LIBERACE, WANK-KING'S WANKER, VIETNAMESE VIOLATOR, SPERM POLLUTER for Hare Raising, UNSTABLE LOAD for sorting out our awards, SOUR KRAUT BONE COLLECTOR for the Rags, FLATULENCE for sign ups and the RA’s EMPEROR AIRHEAD who has traveled back to the States and, the 2 Bad RA’s SCAR W/2TS & NO MORE CUM, then a thanks to those no longer on the committee BALL RINGER, MENTAL & MENSTRUAL DISORDER and FREE WILLY.

The raffle was then held with winners knowing who you are.

ARSE BANDIT made an announcement for the Lunar Run this Friday the 31st at the end of Soi 5 Pratamnak with a bus leaving the Buffalo Bar at 17:30 and returning 9 or 10ish, DIRT LOONEY will still be available for a beer and chat at 4:30 am on the 1st of Feb.

Next it was back to Shorty Shouty NO MORE CUM who iced the Australian’s for Australia Day. Then the Belgium’s on ice and in the bucket with the Slovene Partisans encircling them signing and dancing some old traditional folk song and hopefully putting a curse on the Brussels Empire.

SCAR W/2TS takes over to bucket GING GANG GOOLIES and WANK-KING'S WANKER for sins that can’t be repeated here or ever again in public. Then it was ice time for one of our FRB’s or so we thought as it turns out DEL BOY had ran the walking trail and claimed to have ran the full trail, this would explain his previous FRB status and, SAUSAGE HEAD pulled up on some Back-Check charge.

The Extreme Monkey Cyclists were iced who are ARSE BANDIT, DEL BOY, BOB-A-GOB and NO MORE CUM, well BOB-A-GOB had 4 punctures on their recent ride because HOT GOB will not give him monies to buy new tires for his bike as who needs tread anyway and the now found out short cutter DEL BOY took a tow from a MotoCy taxi up all the hills.

THE WIZARD gave DIRT LOONEY an award for Services to the PH3 and many years Services to the Thailand Brewery Industry and a big thanks from Chang, SIR REALLY SADISTIC BASTARD just gets his yearly Chang award delivered direct to his house.

Wanker Of The Week award was next with nominees being myself ABSOLUTELY NO FUCKING IDEA, HARD ON, SOAPY and the winner G.I. JOE for going for a swim in a lake at the recent Monkey run with his phone still in his pocket.

New names next with DEL BOY wanting his dad to be named, the circle agreed on TRIGGER to keep with the family theme, and then DEL BOY got a lap dance from PENELOPE PITSTOP as it turns out today's Hash run was doubling up as his Stag Party.

SCAR W/2TS iced LORD CHICKEN FUCKER for Hash Crash and then LORD CHICKEN FUCKER took the circle and iced the Hares for his injury claiming Where There’s Blame There’s Claim. but not on the Hash.

LORD CHICKEN FUCKER was then to ice NO MORE CUM with something about School gates and hanging around for sex in toilets with his old friend Charles Lynton and sang "You Dirty Old Fucker You".

BELLY DANCER took the circle to ice ARSE BANDIT, ABSOLUTELY NO FUCKING IDEA, SPERM POLLUTER and NO MORE CUM for soon to be escaping the clutches of the EU, he obviously did not spot the 5th Columnist.

SPERM POLLUTER was then to take the circle and ice BELLY DANCER, THE WIZARD, ARSE BANDIT and DIRT LOONEY which then follow into the Hare’s Song about working with lazy co-hares to the tune of Hound Dog, great song A+.

It was then the Hash Hymn and baht buses back to Nicky’s Bar for more cold beer and great food.

On-On!  Absolutely No Fucking Idea


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