Scribe Report 1536 – August 12th 2013 Hares: A Mental Disorder with a Menstrual Disorder coupled with a Sexy Pussy with a Whipped Bum! Today started very early for many of the members of the PH3. As it was H.M. the Queen’s Birthday the annual Queen’s Birthday Half-Marathon and other associated runs were held, in Sattahip, commencing at 5:30 AM. Many of our local hashers attended the runs and also came to attend today’s PH3 run. I would like to congratulate those who attended both of today’s events.
Mother’s Day at the beach! Well, situated “on the shore of the lake” is very close to how the original directions and map had it planned! But, in all actuality – we circled at the only large dry area, close by a group of mud puddles, just 200 meters from the lake. Why did we have the circle here you ask? Only because 60 or so Thai fishermen and their families had the lake area! Flexibility and quick thinking is the name of the game – and today’s hares played the game well! Always remember “TIT” (this is Thailand) and we are their uninvited guests!
The GM, WANKINGS WANKER jumped off of the bus today looking very distraught! After signups were completed he called the first circle quickly in a very loud profane manner! His profanity fell on deaf ears (as it always does)! The GM was concerned because LORD Chicken F—KER was not amongst us today and the GM had no designated scribe for today! G.I. JOE stated “that anyone could write a scribe report” so he volunteered SIR SPAGHETTI HEAD to be today’s scribe! Now the GM was happy and the run could begin. The hares outlined today’s run, – telling us about paper, paint, 3-sixty’s, back checks, the sky is blue and the grass is green etc, etc. Finely stating “that there was no beer bar within walking distance,” so just go to the upper road and back enjoying nature! Watch out for cars!
The real runners returned to the A-site in approximately 1hr –1hr 20 minutes. The majority of “them exclaiming” a good run/great run etc. Only E.T. and B.B., complained about a check or marking out of place –but, they got no sympathy from the hares. E.T., you haven’t learned yet! Sympathy is between shit and syphilis in the dictionary. As E.T. walked away from the beer truck he slipped in a puddle and became “hash crash”. SIR BOTTOMLESS PIT conducted the raffle with: LIBERACE, BOW WOW, EMPERIOR AIRHEAD, SEXY BUM, PINKY, and HONEY BEAR among the winners! EMPERIOR AIRHEAD iced the hare’s and concluded “with the consensus of the circle” that it was indeed a good run set by today’s hares. BABY WIPES and his virgin “on the ice” and welcomed back. The virgin stated “that she had a great time and would return again”! HULK and SUZY WONG welcomed back from their trip to Viet Nam as “roving reporters”. LONE WOLF and his companion on ice where the lady received her new name of: BOXING KANGAROO! STEWED TOMATOES in the bucket to talk about his views on sexuality! Before he could speak, the HULK proclaimed “that all male models were homosexuals”! Of course, this got HULK a seat in the bucket. GM in to announce tonight’s awards: SEXY BUM – 5 Hared Run Hat; E.T. – 300 Run Shirt. G.I. JOE in and iced: SUZY WONG, SIR BOTTOMLESS PIT, WANKINGS WANKER, and the HULK. BABY WIPES, SIR MC, iced for talking in the circle – joined by E.T. to make it “the 3 Stooges”. SIR SPAGHETTI HEAD, SIR BOTTOMLESS PIT, SIR REALLY SADISTIC BASTARD, and V.V. on the ice for a beer! Returners into the circle: welcomed back and given a
down-down! BANGKA BLOWER, B.B., and TRY-A-F–K on in (but, I cannot remember why)! I think that is was something about mothers – but, that’s a wag! Hares on in for their hare song – which was very quickly labeled “a flop”, which would never make the top 500 chart! The Hash Hymn was completed; beer’s for the bus were taken from the cooler for the ride home; goodnight and see you again filled the air as the bus departed to HW 7. See you all again next week! Thank you hares: MENTAL DISORDER, MENSTRUAL DISORDER, SEXY BUM, PUSSY WIPPED. GOOD JOB!
On-On! Sir Spaghetti Head