Sitting on the bus ,before Johhny took off, wondering if we would escape the impending rain which Pattaya seems to have had quite a lot of in the last few days. As the bus pulls away Sheik MeMe appeared beside the doorway and grinned then took off, l thought fuckit that means when he gets pissed later, we will humping it (the motorcycle) on the bus later that night. (There was Humping going on, on the bus later that night by a nameless German and a visitor from Bangkok ,,But that’s another story). But no it seems he was giving his farewells and apologies for not being available to scribe, and was sailing of into the sunset. So Wanking Wanker our illustrious GM nominated me.
What a great ‘A’ site, The Gravel Pitts ,so large you could get 20 buses in there. New shoe’s ,will W,M,Weasel ever learn he bought his Telac new bunny slippers on the way to the Hash , and she liked them so much refused to change into her trainers ,still it got W,M,Weasel a free drink. The Hares ; true to form ,no dogs, no cattle, no barbed wire, no water, lying barstards The first half a dozen checks kept us all together, then FRB’s took of and were never seen again, As we swam along the trails up to our necks in Mud and Water ,Robbing Bastard commented this a typical VV run .
Lady Ga Ga took a tumble , later she should have been awarded Hash Crash, but seeing as the Thai Ladies have there circle it was not awarded. Near the end of the run a few hashers took a wrong turn and found barbed wire and dogs ,myself included ,then we turned back and found paper again. Six ’O' clock now, the sun going down hope we find the On In soon, five minutes later the On In surrounded by a few cattle , but ‘A’ site in view now, the beer truck does look good and lm not talking about the paint job.
There where 8 winners for the Hash raffle ; Morning Star (later to be renamed), Johnny ,our world famous bus driver, Steptoe, Katoy Magnet, Shit my Pants, Virgin (Nino), Free Whilly, Super Virgin. Emperor Airhead enters the arena to give Liberace girlfriend a Hash name and like true Hasher she laid skin on ice, as she worked in the Medical field , Was Christened Nurse Nancy. Next he calls out Manx Paedophile Bla Bla Bla (who is a rat catcher back in Blighty) and his Telac Morning Star to give her a new name . Renamed Pissed As a rat. Wankings Wanker asked a few of the visitors to come out and have a drink, Katoy Magnet , Super Virgin , visitiors from Norway, and Flash Gordon, Bimbo’s Bimbo from the Harrier Magazine, on his first visit to the PH3. Turd Bugler was given 2 awards 2 glasses of beer , (no expense spared on the PH3) One glass of beer for finally getting to 150 runs after about 22 years, One more beer for his Birthday today, not sure l think 70 something.
Gi Joe came out and iced almost everybody, look-alikes Streaker and no name, Doreen. Turd Burgler and Shit my pants, who both insisted they where givers not takers, Ball Ringer and T-A-F for being as Gullible as Ball Ringer, An eventful night, The Finale and Hash
Song to be performed by Steptoe, who was really on form, iceing all and sundry, he called on the hares to sing us a song ,upon which they sat on ice and Steptoe gave a little rendition , about Free Whilly and his adjournment from Pattaya at the request of Her Majesty’s government , terrific song, And finished with the Hare song. As it was raining harder now and my paper was getting Soggy, it was time for the Hash Hymn. ON ON
On-On! Try-A-Fuck