Well it's a lovely sunny Monday. That makes it a Hash Monday. Which has been a large part of my life for a long time. It is great to see that the Hash is going well after all these years. The Mismanagement doing a fine job of keeping things going. I was amazed when I first started running with the PH3. Every week turning up to do a run. Not thinking of all the work put in by everybody, including hares. We must not get serious, the Hash is about having fun. And everybody fucks up sometime.
A short drive for me to the A site only 10 km.
Mingle mingle chat with old friends. Form a circle. And today hares more Belgians, can you think of a famous Belgian. Hercule Poirot, the only famous Belgian that I can think of is "The Flying Frog" SIR FROG.
Hares tell us about the run. But before the off the lady who owns the land is welcomed in to the circle. And off we go, I walking with BALL RINGER and BEN 10. He was explaining about knee operations. He is quite an expert on knees. Then we come to some mud. I am not getting my new shoes wet. Nobody noticed. Through the cattle, very large bulls there. I have seen many a stampede over the years, very dangerous when they decide to go. Always looking for people the size of REALLY SADISTIC BASTARD. Toss him in the air like a disused condom.
I end up walking with FUZZY LURE and SPLINTER DICK. Three of the senior hashers. Some of the best fauna I have seen in a long time. A man made lake with a small waterfall. Strolling along and then we see this magnificent tree. What a specimen. Hundreds of years old. Another huge lake and back round towards the A site. Had a chat with RATSO EEL SNIFFER, and MINELESS CUNT.
At the A site mingle mingle. The cracks are grazing. They are really good at grazing. You wonder where they find room for all that food. Early beers, after the first front runner is back in.
Circle in 5 we hear. Form a fucking circle. Hares on in. And once again a bunch of Belgians. A smaller bunch this time. Everybody thought the run was good, although lots of up and down. (Up and down like a brides nightie).
SIR FREE WILLY with the Raffle as usual. Some hashers get really excited and get premature ejaculation, you can hear them. oh-oh-oh ha-a-a.
WANK-KING'S WANKER on in for his slot. Have you noticed his hair is growing up like a turnip on top. He looks more like Stan Lurel. (Oliver and Hardy).
HELIUM HEAD on in. And where is HAIRY PUSSY? Apparently she has shaved downstairs, and used after shave. She was last seen buzzing around the bars. Looking for short times. That is the only cure for a shaven flange. When she gets home HELIUM will be waiting with a bucket of ice. That is true love.
The Grand Master MENTAL DISORDER always talking about sex. Brings in some girls to bend over showing us their bums. We end up with two winners who will get a free run next time they show up. Did you notice both girls wearing those tight sport running things? Now when you fart in those things, it cannot get out. It is there until you get home. When arriving home and the garment is pulled off, This lovely warm homely smell drifts through the lounge. The boy friend says, "What the fuck is that smell?". "Only me dear, fancy a 69?"
MENSTRUAL DISORDER on in for haring fifty runs in only five months. A world record. It was mentioned that she is the brains in the outfit. And MENTAL DISORDER has only one brain cell.
PHANTOM on in. I saw him in town today on a bike wearing ladies underwear. It turns out that all Hardly Davidson riders wear the full women's underwear under their leather gear. They want to look Macho, but are really only (Boys Town Riders).
Many personages in the bucket. I think they are attention seekers really.
Hares song performed by myself. (How much is that doggy in the window).
And then a wonderful rendition from REAR GUNNER.
Hash Hymn to end the evening. And another wonderful Monday Hash with PH3.
On-On! Lord Chicken Fucker