"Right, It's 4pm, FORM A CIRCLE!" The Wizard shouted. "This is the last hash run for 2021. Lets get this show on the road. Lets Go Brandon!"
"As you're aware the WHO has created a new mandate for all hashes worldwide. All unvaccinated hashers step aside and circle behind that trash dump over there. Those fully vaccinated, go over there where you will have full access to food, medical aid, a financial stimulus package and beer after the run. "
"All hashers are required to run trail with mask covering mouth and nose. FRBs will be given hazmat suits. There will be no yelling "On On" or "Checking" as this attracts the Covid 19 and the Omicron variant . Anyone talking without their mask on while on trail and/or not socially distancing will be in the bucket."
"If you see the Omicron on trail, walk or jog backwards, as the CDC has proven that the virus can not enter through the rectum. The virus can be contracted via open eyes so its best to run trail with eyes closed. If you find it necessary to open your eyes on trail put your hand over your eyes and just peek from time to time."
"Only vaccinated hashers will break checks as the virus is known to live on sticks. All anti vaxxers will do all back checks to full length regardless if the checks are broken or not. Upon returning to the "A" site, each hasher will have a covid-19 ATK test. If you refuse the test, you will go in the bucket . If tested positive, you will circle in the open sewer treatment plant and be given Sinopharm vaccine.
"Now, Fuck Off, former cop, wearing brown shirt with brown tie, will be checking your vaccination yellow cards. No booster,...behind the trash dump. Any questions...........Yea, Crap Thai."
"Sir, I've been fully vaccinated but didn't know to bring my yellow card."
"Crap Thai, I know full well you have NOT been vaccinated...get in the open sewer treatment plant now...and give me 20."
"Any other stupid questions.... Yea, Sperm Polluter."
"Sir, with all due respect, I haven't been vaccinated and don't wish to be vaccinated"
"Fine.... Sperm Polluter, may your anti-vaxxer corps rot in hell....get your ass in the trash dump."
"And, before I forget, wash your hands before going out on trail. And by all means, don't touch any part of planet earth and be careful what you breathe while you're out there. The virus respects lockdowns but not free ranging humans."
"Sir I have a question."
"Yes, GI Joe, what is it?"
Sir, who is Brandon?
On On to the New Year.
Ghost Rider