Those who woke up in Pattaya this morning found some out-of-season rain that threatened havoc on this weeks Monday run set by veteran hashers V.V. and G.I. Joe.
Luckily it stopped drizzling in time for the 4:30 start but the wetness did make somewhat of a mess for finding paper on trail. But what matter does that make, since it seems Jello Butt was the only hasher to follow paper anyway. But alas, I'm getting a bit ahead of myself.
During the first circle G.I. Joe explained to the non-English speaking hounds by use of creative pictures of cows, fucking dogs, and barbed wire pictures of the various obstacles we might find on trail. At least one hasher found his portrait presented in the pictures.
Sponsors of virgins were warned by the GM Spag Head to watch their virgins on trail. New shoes had a drink and then off we went into the wilds....
The pack was led by Shit Thru a Duck for much of the way followed closely by Roger the Sick Prick, German Sheppard, and Timmy Tight Pants. The pack zigged and zagged over tapioca plants, pineapple fields, motorcycle paths, and old fashion wet shiggy. Plenty of mud and sticky thorns along the way. Luckily the hares provided us a fairly flat terrain to navigate. Checks were very well organized although the pack did get a little confused due to the wet paper that sometimes seemed to blend into the ground making it hard to find. The pack discovered the true to life forms of cows, dogs, and barbed wire as expected on trail. Three quarters of the pack came in within 50 to 60 minutes but those others who followed R U Sure came in at about an hour 20 minutes.
Circle was called by the GM and business was taken care of such as; welcoming returning hashers Retard Wanker, Stupid Kraut Kunt, Red Coat, Wank-King and Rear Gunner. Chicken Nugget surprised us all with getting his 400th appearance at the hash. For much of the circle Flying Frog and Lone Wolf were having their private circle as was Really Sadistic Bastard, Festering Streaker (who is faking injury at the moment) and Ballringer. Frog did provide us with some interesting translation services when needed.
Tom the beer policeman of the night was named "Tom Fucks Jerry" and all the Germans sat on ice called for by Red Coat. Do we really a need a "reason" to ice the Germans?
Lastly, V.V. caught some ice for haring 73 runs and never providing the hash with a song. "ooooaaaaa la papier..." All the fat people sat on ice for being...well...fat. Not all the fat people mind you, just a representative sampling.
The ON IN was at the Outback Bar, a new hash addition to the Monday PH3. I wasn't there so couldn't tell you how it went. But its an Aussie bar so you can imagine there would be plenty of piss to go around.
Thanks to the hares for a great run.
On On
Jello Butt