Under menacing skies THE WIZARD called in the hares and only NECROPHILIA NIGHT RIDER and WANK-KING'S WANKER came in to tell us about the start of the run. The pack started off just as the rain began to fall. The trail zig zagged trough the bush between the highway and the causeway.
Most of the pack turned right and headed for home when the trail emerged onto the road near the causeway. The runners went left, eventually running out of trail and returning via the causeway. First runners in were SEAL SUCKER, PHANTOM and BHPC.
Back at the run site NECROPHILIA was cooking up a batch of hot dogs all the way from California (courtesy of TEASPOON) which was followed by Pork Ribs served up by SQUEEZE and Co.
THE WIZARD called for the circle to form and the hares were duly put on ice. Some comments on the run: DIRT LOONEY - Too long, not enough dogs; LIBERACE - Can't remember; SEAL SUCKER - Over Achieved. A comment was made that more hash signs would have been appreciated - EMPEROR AIRHEAD response was that he barely got the bread. G.I. JOE made the ribs. SPAG HEAD's contribution, moral support. DIRT LOONEY gave the first note for the hares. Nosh - rated very good.
FREE WILLY came in the circle to run the Raffle with the prizes including a watch donated by COLONEL CORNHOLE and three Budweiser beers donated by the Americans. Nine deserving winners included TEASPOON who won chocolates two weeks in a row.
THE WIZARD called the hares back on ice plus CIA for a quiz on all things American. Three questions were asked of each hasher with the loser to end up in the bucket. EMPEROR AIRHEAD got three loaded questions with the third one being a choice of A and B. A) What is the number of pairs of breeding bald eagles in the US? B) What is the latin name for the American bald eagle. Answer: Haliaetus Leucocephalus. Of course this meant EMPEROR AIRHEAD ended up in the bucket. RSB gave a note.
The hares were asked to sing a song and AIRHEAD responded by leading a rendition of "The One-Eyed Trouser Snake". THE WIZARD then called in three hashers at a time in a quiz based on American Collegiate Year Book Awards. Some categories included: Most likely to have a sex changes op. Most likely to become a mass murderer.
By the a process of elimination three became two and two became one.
The final two standing were RSB and HARBOUR WHORE. HARBOUR WHORE won the popular vote and was declared the winner. Certainly a crowd pleaser.
The GM handed the circle to WANK-KING'S WANKER who handed out the awards. NA HEE MAN - 50 run shirt and CIA - 50 run shirt. THE WIZARD gave a down down to WANK-KING'S WANKER for 20 hared runs and NECROPHILIA NIGHT RIDER for 10 hared runs.
RAT VON KIEL called the Englishmen into the circle on a Soccer related charge. A suspicious packet of white powder was presented to THE WIZARD.
THE WIZARD's "Wanker of the Week" Award. LIBERACE was called into the circle as reigning "Wanker of the Week". Last week LIBERACE went 5 kms on a 400 metre walk and got lost. He had phoned in his location to WANK-KING'S WANKER as being close to a tapioca field. ARSE-HOLEO was put on the ice for talking in the circle. The candidates for this week: LIBERACE, NA HEE MAN, and CANNONBALL for indulging in coffee, tea and toast on a bar crawl on the Dark Side. CANNONBALL was declared the winner.
THE WIZARD called in LORD CHICKEN FUCKER to run the circle. BURL IVES was called in, however, he had already left. All the hashers under the tent followed by all the hashers with umbrellas followed by all the hashers in rain ponchos were called in to sit on the ice. A down down was given.
B.B. was put on ice and offered the choice of a song or a joke. He responded with a song - "Singing in the Rain". Appropriate for the night. The Belgians were called to sit on the ice as they were playing in the World Cup tonight - The Belgians won 3-2 over Japan!!!
THE WIZARD took over the circle again. As the rain showed no sign of easing up, the final twelve down downs were taken followed by a rendition of the Hash Hymn. The site was packed up - thanks to all the hashers who helped VV to load up the vehicle and the baht buses departed for town.
On On was at Nicky's Bar where a lively crowd enjoyed the nosh of sweet and sour chicken and rice. Special mention to POCKET SOCKET and LIBERACE who looked after COLONEL CORNHOLE's children whilst a motor cycle taxi gave him a 200 baht tour of Pattaya. COLONEL CORNHOLE had exited the hash baht bus 500 metres up Soi Bua Khao from Nicky's looking for a place to have a piss.
The rain had finally stopped.
On-On! Slug