Monday again and off the baht bus trundles toward the 3240 and the A site sometimes referred to as the Aussie Site. A large turn out today with plenty of parking.
GM THE WIZARD calls the first circle and virgins are introduced followed by today's hares LOVE BOAT and TAMPAX to explain the run, Runners Trail and Short Cutters Trail, this confused some of the diehard runners as a few of them are short cutters trying to be FRB's. Off the pack goes with REALLY SADISTIC BASTARD taking the lead for the Beer Hunters.
On returning from the run may I just point out WANK-KING’S WANKER took a tumble backwards off of one of NECROPHILIA NIGHT RIDER's chairs.
THE WIZARD calls the second circle and first business of the evening was to deal with some sinners, CRAPPER was iced for an early beer, should have been an early bath in the bucket, UNSTABLE LOAD was Hash Crash for being unstable on the trail and BALL RINGER had his Hash Trash removed and given to KEE MAH, don’t fret BALL RINGER you will surely win the Hash Trash Trophy back soon.
Next it was hares LOVE BOAT and TAMPAX to be iced and the circle asked to review the run, great run was the cry from the front runners and those who took the short cutters trail said that once they got into the groove of the trail you could not get out of it.
MENTAL DISORDER assisted by LOST CAUSE held the raffle, HELIUM HEAD was iced for trying to claim with the wrong ticket, but winners included KEE MAH who grabbed the wine and I bet he won’t be leaving that at the A-site unless the bottle is empty, LIBERACE, Siriruk (girlfriend of BBG), STEPTOE, ARSE VAN HOLE and John Saftic.
Next on ice was SCAR W/2TS as it was his birthday, nobody knew exactly what his age was but we all guessed that it was well above his IQ, anyway he was presented with a birthday cake but he just wanted another beer, Skoll.
EMPEROR AIRHEAD takes the circle to ice the hares LOVE BOAT and TAMPAX and to compliment them on a run well set, a great A-site and for doing a great job. Also noting that one year ago there had been a typhoon on the run and I’m guessing EMPEROR AIRHEAD had a great ride on the bike home from that a-site. SCAR W/2TS was iced again for his birthday along with ANAL CHEESE.
Then EMPEROR AIRHEAD put Peter from Alberta, Canada on the ice, this guy has been laying concrete for over 40 years now but it was time for a name, after much debate he was named NO CURE. Virgins where introduced to the circle Mike from Toronto and Katya from Finland.
The circle was handed to MENTAL DISORDER for the Wanker of the Week Award and the Wooden Spoon Oscar, nominees this week were SCAR W/2TS for his latest movie "Piss on the Walls, Piss on the Floor, Piss on the Ceiling and Fall out the Door", NO MORE CUM for his lead role in "No More Crimean Passion" (the sequel to this movie is to be named "The Great Escape" but the lead role is yet to be announced), DIRT LOONEY for the documentary "1,500 metres in 10 Hours Drinking with Derek and a View from the Gutter", THE WIZARD for the brilliant "It’s My Ball and I’m Taking It Home" and CANNONBALL for the "From Patriots to Priest and Onto The Depths of Depravity". The vote was held and the winner was DIRT LOONEY with "Drinking With Derek".
NO MORE CUM takes the circle to ice the hares and comments on LOVE BOAT's lack of needle work skills in sewing on her patches, REALLY SADISTIC BASTARD was brought in to show off all his fine collection of patches but it was pointed out the it was only stubborn under stains holding them together.
Next it was the PH3 awards with WANK-KING’S WANKER a hasher who has spent most of his life short cutting on the long road to ruin but never in the circle. It was MENTAL DISORDER 250 Runs, a 50 run shirt for SHE’S THE BOSS, 100 run shirt for ARSE VAN HOLE and 900 run shirt for V.V. There was a special award shirt for LOST CAUSE for all the work she has done for the PH3.
LORD CHICKEN FUCKER takes to the circle for a few jokes and ices NO MORE CUM about him having his condo refurbed into a dungeon and tying his guests down.
The hare’s song was called and LOVE BOAT sang the Swedish National Anthem with backing by TAMPAX. The Hash Hymn was sang and then ON ON to the TQ for Hot Dogs, Cold Beers, Rock ‘N’ Roll and SCAR's surprise party, just wish someone had told him.
On-On! Absolutely No Fucking Idea