One of the finest runs in the PH3 calendar is the much anticipated and eagerly awaited St George's Day Run with many people making a special effort to ensure it went to plan, especially the Hares who were LORD CHICKEN FUCKER, TAMPAX, TURD BURGLAR and POLE FUCKER who laid on a superb BBQ and traditional English Gin and Tonic. POLE FUCKER also brought a home fermented brandy and some fine XO Cognac which showed the international spirit (pardon the pun) of the day. And it was great to see this approach by the hares in serving a truly international selection of food and drinks at what must be one of the most socially diverse hashes in the world.
Grand Master THE WIZARD called the second circle to order and put the hares on the ice and then asked people what they thought of the run. BALL RINGER said it was ok and BEETROOT HEAD thought there were too many gates. JACK WOW thought he said too many gays which raised a few smiles. SPERM POLLUTER thought it was an amazing run, but then again he’s easily pleased.
The Hares were then fed whilst seated on the ice from the GM’s Food Bank (a sad sign of the times is that we have food banks in England) and then were thanked for their sterling efforts by all.
Next up was the raffle which included some excellent prizes, TWO TIME was the first winner and chose the towels, she also won again, choosing the chocolates. One of the new Belgians won a T Shirt and then made a false call, thinking he’d won again, but had the wrong ticket number so was quite rightly put on the ice. UNSTABLE LOAD won the wine, BROTHERLY LOVE's girlfriend (no Hash name yet) won the headphones, one of the new Norwegians won two T shirts, REAR GUNNER won the Whisky, SOUR KRAUT BONE COLLECTOR won the tea bags (apparently he likes a bit of tea bagging), one of the visiting ladies won the biscuits and Luke won the beer.
STUPID KRAUT KUNT, the current Wanker of the Week nominated Dutch Tonny to take over this venerable accolade as Dutch Tonny couldn’t remember his wife’s telephone number to call her after he lost his phone after a drinking session with his pals. All his pals however did know his wife's telephone number (to the surprise of Dutch Tonny) so they were able to help him.
EMPEROR AIRHEAD took the circle, references to Seven Belly Betty were made, unfortunately a motorbike helmet wouldn’t fit her as she also had seven chins! NIKO CAR LICKER and LUKE SKYWALKER were named by the EMPEROR.
WANK-KING'S WANKER took the circle to present me (BOB-A-GOB) with my 50 run shirt, which looks great and was very much appreciated. POLE FUCKER was congratulated for 5 Hared Runs.
The leavers were called into the circle, including NO MORE CUM, who won't be crashing his car anymore as he left it in Nuremberg. SCAR W/2T'S is returning to Norway, ANTIQUE is returning to Whitby and BEETROOT HEAD to Blackburn.
SIR DOG made a welcome return and was mentioned as was ALICE and SPERM POLLUTER's codpiece for some reason.
All in all, a fabulous run, first rate food and drinks, plenty of beer chilled to perfection by our brew master VV and a world class circle which is why the PH3 is on the bucket list of many hashers around the globe.
On-On! Bob-A-Gob