© Pattaya H3. All rights reserved. Our Run reports are the property of pattayah3.com. These run reports are not for publication on other unscrupulous web-sites.
Well after 10 months back in the UK it’s great to get back to Thailand and the Pattaya H3 and after saying a few hellos to a few familiar faces the circle was called and new shoes dealt with.
This weeks hares Madame Claude & Mademoiselle Chang and some one they call VV who rumour has it might have done some of this hare stuff before, so they gave us the run instructions and off we went, along a few sandy trails, around a few gum trees, round a large lake and zigzagging a small stream , the trail was well papered and what seemed to me to be a good length and enjoyable first run back.
After arriving back at the beer truck and catching up with a few more hashers I was caught up by the stand in GM Free Willy in the absence of Seaman Stains and informed that I am the lucky winner of a free run ticket and with a “by the way your this week scribe”.
It’s at this point I was thinking that I should have paid a bit more attention to the run itself instead of just chatting.
Anyway the circle was called and the hares put on ice and the views of the crowd where taken, Good run was called all round and up to the usual Madame Claude & Mademoiselle Chang standard.
The raffle was led by Flipper and the lucky winners where Stink Sloppy Seconds, That’s the One, Dirty Pussy, Sausage Queen, Thaigher, Baby Wipes, Honda Wet Dream, Mademoiselle Chang, Open Zoo, Flying Finn, Bangker Blower & Free Willy who put Wham Bam in the bucket for his prize.
Charlie Manson takes the circle to check under Sir Spaghetti Head’s cap and the spaghetti hairs as still there, like we thought it was going to grow back or something, so that’s him happy for his 50th.
Fucking Dog is given Hash Trash for his daughter Snoopy littering the A site, now remember what we are told “If you have a dog leave it at Home” so Snoopy please leave your father at home next week so he does not get into any more hash Trash or maybe just stop littering.
Next in the circle was Sheik MeMe who iced the hares again as he wanted a second opinion on the run, which is a first in itself, not Sheik MeMe ever asking a second opinion on anything but this was the first hash he has ran on and not run the trail even though he ran around the ice enough times, he even put Linguini Weeny in the bucket for bad language which I think was Flemish.
Next for Sheik MeMe to ice was Airy Pussy showing some skin on the ice but just for being a lawyer and, the fact that Fuck the Truth had popped back to town for a fag, which town nobody heard quite right but he was very keen to get there before opening time.
Anyway whilst MeMe was on a roll he iced and bucketed a load of hashers for things that they must be guilty of as our on site lawyer Airy Pussy was not called back into the circle and the bucket of truth had Charlie Manson confessing to being way beyond the 50 years old earlier claimed.
Baby Wipes in the bucket for not closing his mouth when the Sheik was in mid something.
Some more folk where iced by the Sheik but it was around this time I was trying to get another Beer Lao which had just ran out and I lost the plot or maybe it was not just me.
G.I.Joe, Barnacle Bollox, Bangker Blower and the man they call Horse where all framed on some Burma bum wrap, heinous crime No. 1
Baby Wipes back in the bucket as he forgot “a closed mouth gathers no foot” and when its MeMe’s foot
Back in a parallel universe on a parallel hash two virgin Canadians are put on ice Tommy Taylor and Scott Ansell, this might be some sort of a Canadian exchange scheme as we are losing Pugsly and Uncle Pervy today and I know that Pervy had brought all of his remaining home brew to be used up for a farewell drink (and to leave none for baby brother) & put most of the usual Home Brew Crew including Emperor Airhead into such a complete spin that they had to drag themselves home while they could.
Sir Spaghetti Head takes the circle and puts Sheik MeMe on the ice or at least tries too but, he keeps falling off due to that lame foot of his and as it turns out he has already been to see a Veterinary doctor, a Gynecologist (cunt doctor) and finally Doctor Dick The Dick Doctor, Spag Head it was MeMe’s foot that was the problem so “a closed mouth gathers no foot” or back to see the second specialist, anyway Sheik MeMe just put himself in the bucket so everybody was happy with the prognosis!
Big Dawg & Pugsly (F7 this one and you get Pigsty or Pug Sly which happens to be French Canadian for anal butt plug) on ice for heinous crimes whilst Back Stabbing Cunt the real villain hid behind another potential victim.
Clit with an S & his Goy on ice for being a 5* Michelin burger flipper but, they aren’t the only thing that he flipped by the end of the evening.
Airy Pussy is handed over ice powers so in the bucket and on the ice for all those guilty hasher that she has had to prosecute/defend for more heinous crimes against the hash inc. Sheik MeMe, Free Willy and the rest of you, we know who you are so next time just own up to it and put yourself in the bucket and be done with it.
Sir Chicken Fucker sang a song for the hares, I can’t remember for the life of me what the song was, but then I would be very surprised if he did himself. (Sir Chicken take a copy of this Hash sheet home with you, sit down by the fire, sharing a nice cold glass of beer with Sir T4 and just try and remember why you put on the fire when its already 32 degrees C & then throw it on the fire)
Charlie Manson leads us in the Hash Hymn and it was a very long journey back to the Boomerang Bar for reasons that are not important but, where Clit with an S did some burger flipping demos but using volunteer hasher instead of burgers, and thanks for the shooters Boomerang Bar.
Disclaimer:
If I have missed anybody out or got any of the facts wrong that’s harsh I know but, you where there, you know what happen, this is for those PH3 hasher around the world not able to be with us on this great night of hashing and for those too wankered to remember.
by the way did I mention Sheik MeMe was there!
ON ON
Absolutely No Fucking Idea
© Pattaya H3. All rights reserved. Our Run reports are the property of pattayah3.com. These run reports are not for publication on other unscrupulous web-sites.