HELLBOY HAS THE I.Q. OF PONDLIFE...
The following takes place between 4pm and 9pm on the day of the hash. We arrive at the a site to find it on fire, but being hashers we do not worry about small problems like that, the sign up guys Bullringer the gullible as he is called by Really Sadistic Bastard and Pussy Snatcher are again trying to do sign ups with no table. I deliver the raffle prizes to sexy old Torpedo Tits so she can sell some tickets, she obviously did not like the job as I noticed later Pussy Snatcher who is definitely not as sexy trying to sell raffle tickets to the masses..
After telling them to use my pick up as a table one of the first people I meet is that Norwegian hippy with his hybrid phantom harley Rasputin. Bottomless Pit the miserable and the overweight turtle Hellboy in there normal position sat next to the beer truck, as I sat along side Hellboy fat was handed a list of potential mis-management hashers for the upcoming AGM run by Free Willy. I noticed a few before the paper went into his pocket, Colonel Cornhole gets the most disliked hasher passed down to him from Arse-holeo, Same Same is awarded fisting champion, Hellboy is the new Free Willy look alike, Liberace greatest hair dying award from E.T., Odd Job keeps his position as he is really odd, Bottomless Pit the real Miserable Cunt, who else was on the list I did not see but I am sure we will find out.
The circle is now called by GM Seaman Stains two lots of new shoes dealt with then off we trot through fields and bushes on a long run but nice with flames lapping at our heels, I was first in as usual and Ringworm runner up who had been listening to Turd Burglar talking about his blue cock and how to get rid of it I did not know he doesn't like birds.
Icy Davidson sporting a new hair style which makes him look like a serial killer on drugs. Everyone back safely apart from a few burns a noisy circle forms and the fun begins, on Seaman Stains last performance he decides to bring back hash Trash which is awarded to Ball Ringer and hash crash to Scar With Two T's who was beaten up by a katoey dwarf with one leg. Karamba leaves early to go and work in Russia if it has not been bombed.
The circle ends after the normal fun and frolics and perversion from Sir Chicken Fucker and then we are off to the happy hour for more beer where Scar With Two T's and Pissed Pole Dancer got me totally pissed again, the last time Pissed Pole Dancer got me drunk I crashed the hash mini bus its a great life over here..
On On
Miserable Cunt