The Seal Sucker Event
Prelude: Members who stepped up and went beyond expectations.
In true HASHER fashion, The Wizard came through with a spare pair of shoes for, Sperm Polluter; who forgot to bring his. Kudos to, The Wizard for stepping up that way.
Dragon was a little under the weather; read hungover. So she treated everyone to a fashion show, sporting high heeled cork sandals. In true HASHER fashion, despite feeling unwell, Dragon showed up to cheer us all on and to manage the raffle for us.
Somebody needs to conduct and intervention with, Cocktail. She keeps buying new shoes. Does she have a shoe addiction? Or, an addiction to free shoe beers?
Lady Drink was involved in a moped wreck. Lady Drink showed up sporting huge bruises, abrasions and a black eye. That’s true, HASHER spirit. Despite these serious injuries, Lady Drink still managed to limp off with the, Beer Hunter’s and brighten their day.
Cookie Monster invested a huge amount of effort in cooking delicious food for all the HASHERS to enjoy at the conclusion of the run. Way to go, Cookie Monster!
In the absence of, Vietnamese Violator, Two Time and, Dirt Looney stepped into VV’s size 14 combat boots and filled the beer truck; arguably the most important job at the, HASH!
Main Event:
Banana Rider was flung into a hornets nest by, No Banana.
Banana Rider was stung several times and needed to lay down for a little bit after the walk. On a personal note, I have oft dreamt about calling a motorcycle taxi to give me a ride back to the ’A’ Site. Banana Rider and No Banana finally made that dream come true; hiring a bike to drive them in. Bravo. Speedy recovery, Banana Rider!
Sir Really Sadistic Bastard brought the, Beer Hunters back late. Many speculate that the inclusion of, Lady Drink and Lady Mao sparked a desire to stay in the bar a little longer.
Herring Choker came back first for the male runners. Congratulations, Herring Choker. A huge honourable mention goes out to, Sperm Polluter for coming in second, after leaving on the run late. Good job men.
Nid came in first for the ladies. Well done to, Nid, especially as this was only her fourth HASH.
In an outstanding display of either, bravery or stupidity, YMCA decided to do battle with a tree. Clubbing the tree with his head, YMCA proudly returned to the circle sporting a duelling scar on his crown. No word on any injuries the tree may have suffered.
Speaking of injuries, Fleece Lifter managed to field test a collapsible cutting tool; drawing blood from his preferred self-gratification hand in the process. Way to blunder your way through it, Fleece Lifter.
The Circle:
Shithead was especially helpful to, The Wizard, offering sage remarks throughout the proceedings. Which made for some humorous interactions between the two. Future, GM material there.
Seal Sucker escaped having a cake made on his head, but he did embiggen the evening by bringing a stash of hotel minibar bottles of whiskey to dole out to the, ice riders. On top of, haring the run. Good job.
Displaying exceptional skills our, GM (The Wizard) conducted a marriage counselling session with, She’s the Boss and Happy Survivor on the ice. Grievances were aired and Issues were resolved.
New recruits, Eric and Wes were iced for daring to show their faces back at HASH. Eric has a lot to learn, as not only did he wear his cum tag into the circle, he left it on the ice afterwards! The makings of a fine HASHER there.
Conclusion:
Despite being very humid, and under constant threat of rain, everybody’s spirits were high, making this one of the most enjoyable HASHES yet. A special thanks to everyone behind the scenes who brought it all together. Thank You.
On On Mount Me