It is the rainy season in Pattaya, or is it the monsoon season now, so we are getting used to having some rain on the hash. The first arrivals to the Aussie A site experienced light rain that kept up for some time but thanks to the gazebo the sign ups were in the shelter and the Rags sales too. The new stock of raincoats proved popular as did Something Stupid’s new Carroll Shelby T shirt.
There were four virgins this run, two young girls from Slovenia, Goy from Thailand and a Dutch guy, Bert. A couple of these also had to drink from their new shoes and try and balance and keep their socks from getting wet and muddy.
The hares explained the run as the Beer Hunters shuffled off to their drinking spot a short walk away where Sir Velcro Dick provided Curacao for his upcoming birthday and Billion Sucker shared his bottle of coffee liqueur along with biscuits. The arrival of two Thai girls on a motorcycle caused much interest and sharing of drinks and wondering whether one of them was really a female.
Back to the A site and Seal Sucker was there so thought the runners were back but he didn’t follow trail and the first runner back was returner, MudCracker. The hares generously provided red wine and whiskey and a delicious meal of spaghetti with salmon cream sauce and somtam for those who liked something spicier. Thank you hares.
GM called the second circle and Happy Survivor and Mayo Queen were on the ice for Hash Crash and the GM awarded himself Hash Trash for leaving his umbrella behind.
The hares, Something Stupid, Something Kinder, VV, Two Time, Parisian Titi and Chip Chip were iced and asked who did what. Something Stupid said he laid the trail and cooked the food. Comments on the trail ranged from ok to good and everyone liked the area even if there were pre-defined tracks.
Raffle time again and there were many happy winners including visitor Peking Fuck who won a T shirt.
Emperor Airhead’s circle and first up the hares are iced and asked how many are French. Four are French and two are Thai. Airhead liked the salmon and said Something Stupid had proved he is a great man. Next VV and Hot Wheels are in. Hot Wheels came on the hash 16 years ago with VV. He now lives in Udon Thani and drove his motorcycle down to be with us.
Four ladies on the ice next, Pink Head and Pink Lady from China and Something Kinder and Barbara from France. They have made a pact to be hares in three months. They had better get more comfortable with being on the ice.
The two young Virgins from Slovenia were iced and quizzed by Air Head about what it was like being in a land of old men here.
The GM took the circle again for his Wanker of the Week award. Herring Choker for not being able to use a stapler, Wild Wolf for not knowing the difference between Thai and French people, Crap Thai because he forgot the spoon, and Something Stupid because he cleverly didn’t put water in the bucket till after the hares had been on the ice. And the winner was Something Stupid.
Mud Cracker and Seal Sucker were on the ice because Seal Sucker said Mud Cracker came in first because he had been out in advance and knew where all the back checks were and even laid the sticks for the back check the wrong way to confuse him. Seal Sucker denied this and said GI Joe told him. Herring Choker was then put on the ice for rivalry between Norway and Sweden but I thought they were both Norwegian??
My Girlfriend Knows I’m Gay is leaving to go back to Belgium and coming back 25 December if the flights aren’t too expensive so guess we’ll see him some time in February. In the meantime his girlfriend can party for three months.
YMCA was iced for not informing the GM about his Virgin, Bert.
Sperm Polluter’s circle and he iced Linda and her husband and then handed over to Mud Cracker who asked Linda if she always comes first before her husband not only on trail but in the bedroom. Seal Sucker was iced and he complained that he got on the walkers trail because there was so much paper everywhere.
The GM put Something Stupid on the ice for his birthday and as Velcro Dick had disappeared, Crap Thai was his substitute to be sung Hashy Birthday,
The hares didn’t want to sing a song so Wild Wolf sang for them. “The French they love their champagne, escargots and Camembert. Singing aye aye Frenchie”
Crap Thai, Brotherly Love, Something Kinder, Something Stupid, Shit on my Chest, Panzer Fister, Jean-Paul, Blow Lewinsky, Barbara and Sperm Polluter sang the Final Down Down followed by the Hash Hymn led by Ball Ringer.
Then it was on to the Baht buses back to June’s Cocktail Bar for lots more fun.
On-On Sauce for the Goose