Well how about that Sauce for the Goose puts forward my name to be the scribe for this Monday hash and how can I refuse as I have always worked on the principle. It’s not what the hash can do for you, It’s what you can do for the hash .
So on this sunny rather hot Monday afternoon the A site looks rather deserted as most of the hashers have scattered around the nearby palm trees and any other shade shelter they can find from the piercing big yella in the sky.
GM Oz calls first circle so we can get the show of the road and on to the trail
Two virgins are called in, a couple young guys who Whoredini has introduced to the hash and who knows what else.
As per usual GM Oz gives the virgins good advice; stay with an experienced hasher as if you get lost no one will come to rescue you.
One virgin is back in circle to sample a nice cold Chang from his new shoe
Ball Ringer and Bell End explain the trail as flat and fast approximately 5 km walk 10km run an a well-marked split.
To prevent the colossal stuff up that was made last time at this particular a site Ball Ringer leads us to the out trail so unlike the last time a hasher from Phuket lead us out on the runs in trail man this hashing is complicated .
The hares are correct a great, great, great run well papered and challenging checks which keep the pack together.
The walk /run split was well marked red for runners and blue for walkers even my self was one of the many who yelled out run /walk split but to some who were hoping to just run the walk were oblivious to the markings. It’s a miracle these people can find there toilets in their own rooms or perhaps they don’t.
It’s still hot and sunny as we make it back to the tantalizing beer truck for the end rewards of the nectar of the gods i.e. cold beer.
GM Oz calls second circle hash crashes are Jackal, Chuck the fuck up and Sauce for the Goose who complained that she can’t spread her legs as wide as she used to be able, too much information I thought.
Herring Choker is in the bucket for not singing hash song and still not knowing the words even when they are written down for the morroon
Don’t call me Dick, Mr Cheap and GM Oz on ice for several of many who missed the split.
The waffle is dealt with and many happy hashers get to be winners.
EAH ices the hares for a good trail laid by the most happiest married couple in the Pattaya or perhaps the whole world.
No name German Carl is called into circle to get his name. We find out he was a gym instructor in Germany, he was in charge of dispensing the analbolic steroids so ended up with appropriate name of Anal Acrobat
During the EAH's analysis of the days event from the beer hunters bar there is a commotion near the circle with Sip Baht revving up the baht bus with the two virgins setting of to look for and rescue Whoredini who has still not returned to the A site, good luck with that mugs.
The jovial circle carrys on with numerous misdemeanours, GI Joe retains wanker of the week for the third week in a row. Fleece Lifter is awarded 100 runs. Shit Head is ushered into the circle to sing hares song a short two verse version of her hairs hang down from her little dicky dido.
It’s the final down down and hash hymn is sung vigorously.
Whilst we are sampling nice fish pasta and more beers at Nicky’s it’s been reported that Whoredini is safe and well at the mental ward that he escaped from.
Looking forward to the veterans run next week
On On Seal Sucker (aka Zeal Zucker)