PH3 Run 2096 Happi Coat Run
Monday, April 28, 2025
Scribe Report Scribe: Diaper Sniper
Our weekly gathering is getting smaller but still a healthy 88 signups this week. A-Site was well shaded and provided with copious gnats and flies to inspire all to get out and move. Hares were all novices: VV, Two Time, A Dingo Ate My Baby, Paprika Smiley and SLAP aka Squeals like a Pig. As usual, VV promised a flat trail with no water. He did his best to make us walk in water, but the trail was just damp after a healthy rainfall today. Apparently, after the split he ran out of paper for a km or so until the end of the trail. Many walkers wandering the pineapple fields looking for traces. Maybe after some more experience with haring VV will do better.
Paprika Smiley put on a nice pasta feast prepared by staff chefs, VV and Two Times. The nice feed was appreciated by all after a hot and damp run.
GM called second circle at 6:30.
Fashion Police: Today’s run is the Happi Coat run but upon investigation it is actually just Happi. So Happi Coat is like what we say in the USA, Rio Grande River. Anyway you say it, a nice tradition and way to show where you have participated in Hashes. Paprika Smiley might need more than a few. GM called out hare Two Times with her “explosion of color” to be his Sergent at Arms and wear the tiny helmet. The Wizard was asked to the ice and also granted a tiny beanie for the first of a few visits today. Overheard…”looks like he escaped from Upstairs/Downstairs.” GM had promised to never criticize the Wizard’s choice of dress but wearing the red Hawaiian shirt was just too much. Two Chiang Mai hashers in town for Sunday’s outstation were given a spot on the ice for their beautiful blue Dirt Road easter egg shirts.
Hash Trash: First up was a Cabella’s hat…should be a clue from an American chain. Emperor Airhead shouted out “that’s my fucking hat” The Wizard claimed a medium ladies shirt..clearly he needs more shirts. Last up was a nice umbrella. Two Time looking out for her partner as always said “That’s VV’s” Turns out VV loaned it to Minnie Mouse who being smaller than the umbrella couldn’t lift it.
Hash Crash: Pussy Snatcher claimed that driver Sip Baht pushed him. GI Joe said that “a root got away” from him but I think his wife pushed him. Ballringer who was searching for paper and Jackal just fell down, because that is their special talent.
Hares called to the Ice: V.V, Two Time, Paprika Smiley, A Dingo Ate My Baby and SLAP. Time to face the music about their run. General comments were in favor of the trail. Comments shared included. “Total f**kup” “Not enough Sh1t on the trail” Someone liked it. “Hot as hell” “bit hard to find the trail” Two Time did a good job on the trail. Glass Cow said it was the worst trail ever but then explained that this was an example of his Scots sarcasm. He went on the say it was “a great trail.” Leaving everyone to wonder which part was the sarcasm???
Raffle:
- After he woke up and checked his tickets, GM was the first winner. Did he even pick up a prize?
- Yanky Crank won some whiskey but sinned by bringing his hat and bag into circle…”Ice him” Maybe after he has more experience he will learn the traditions.
- Tan the Beer Truck Man won something but had to ride the ice for bringing his bag into circle
- Sir Velcro Dick won beer and crisps aka potato chips
- Stupid Kraut Kunt won some shampoo but headed to ice for bringing his towel. Now he can finally take a bath.
- Better Not Speak had to take the backpack when she was caught fondling all of the prizes. “No Shopping”
- No Name Sandeep won a t-shirt and hat
- My Ring Tone won the cookies
RA Emperor Air Head took over the circle. Told us the GM often comes to visit at TQ but tries to keep his identity secret. After inviting the Happi wearing hares to the ice, he asked them to explain what they did today. Paprika Smiley said he was the sponsor because he paid for the feed. The Emperor was thankful that the hares had the foresight to find an A-Site with a covered shelter just in case of rain. He also thanked the hares for helping us understand Hash traditions like the Happi Coat. Nex up were Purple Fart and his pal ex- policeman No Name Timmy. Timmy was granted a one year reprieve from getting christened by EA. The Emperor then did one of his scientific country surveys where he managed to come up with the USA being the best and claiming that no further surveys were needed because all countries are the USA now. Chiang Mai visitors were also called to ice to thank them for coming. The leftover Filipino visitors were called to the ice to tell about their TQ escapades. Asked if they would be at the TQ later? NO was the firm answer.
Dyke Convertor from Chiang Mai entertained us with some new interesting Hash songs. Beer hunters found their way to the ice and Dog Shit managed to empty the bucket. The Emperor was called to the ice but he had managed a quick escape after his turn at the circle.
Those sporting Happi Coats VV, Sirgin, Wizard, Mini Mouse, Ballringer, SLAP, Dingo and Two Time, were called to form a circle around the ice. GM said he had his favorites. They did a fashion parade and the circle voted and surprise GM’s two picks were the final two. Dingo won the top award which was a free hash. Congrats to all.
RA The Wizard took over the circle. He put VV, Beetroot Head and Whore in the Window on the ice. VV was taken to task after promising a flat water free run..Lesson: Never believe VV when he talks about trails. The Wizard then went on to question VV about previous trips to this current A-site and lessons learned about where to park. Turns out VV has been here dozens of times proceeded to park where he got stuck before. Luckily Hash Hero Whore in the Window who came prepared with ropes rescued VV so he could drive home. Next up was Beet Root Head who had shared a funny video with friends that involved his 5 year old daughter playing with a puppet that she found. Very cute.
Turns out this exposition was just a prelude for the Wanker of the Week. The Wizard started the vote to win the coveted wood spoon but the suddenly realized that he had forgotten Baht bus star Fat Max who was hiding in the shadows. Of course Fat Max is back after a 4 hash exile for mistaking the baht bus for something it isn’t right on Sukhumvit. Luckily nobody made any videos. Despite copious mea culpas and apologies, Fat Max went in the bucket. After the votes were counted and by an overwhelming margin, Fat Max took away the award. Lets see if he can out perform his 4 hash run of WOTW from last year.
RA The Wizard invited the virgins into the circle. They said they enjoyed the run. Ten year old Lim from Thailand and Germany and Marcel from Netherlands. Lim was warned not to drink too much beer.
Recognitions: Yanky Crank has 50 runs and Wizard has attained 400 runs. “Get a life” was overheard.
Hares sang a song… I think it was in Japanese.
RA Wizard led the final down down and hash song.
The On-On bar was the soon to be renamed Pot Hole bar.
On-on until next week Diaper Sniper.