PH3 Run 2105 Monday, June 30, 2025
Scribe Repor
Scribe: Diaper Sniper
A healthy slow season 61 signups today. No food because VV’s chef went on strike. Today’s hares of distinction were Who the Duck am I? Showing novice hares VV and Two Time the ropes. Here's to hoping they can independently set up a run some day. It was reported that while VV and Who took a nap they left Two Time to clear all of the brush from the new A site. Maybe she can come to my house? Anyway, job well done and many comments in second circle about what a nice spot it is, especially from Glass Cow who said he would always like to come here because it is his back yard. Two virgins were introduced: Mie from Norway whose hasher parents were showing her what a great wholesome place Pattaya is and Jean Pierre "call me JP" from Switzerland. Admiral Milky Piss reminded us of some open spots on the upcoming Booze Cruze..I think he said they are on the gang plank. Continuing his confusion as a virgin Jean Pierre "call me JP" was called in for his new shoes and got a free beer. Ever trustworthy VV promised a flat trail for everyone…has he ever lied to us? He and Two Time kindly guided us away from some huge bee nests. Lucky for us as Who was stung multiple times when VV told him to check if the nest was active. It turns out that the walk was flat and dry and like a grasslands bush walk.
GM called second circle at 6:30. Welcome to what I like to call the “Strap on to the weekend.” Who is on the business end of that I wonder?
Fashion Police: Mini Mouse was deputuzed as the FP Liutenant and Shelby shirt wearing Norwegian Runner lady who does’t remember her hash name Linda was made the FP sargeant. Mini was getting a lot of attention for her more than skin tight white leggings and many cries for “ice her” were overheard. “Wait until she gets wet” was overheard. No fashion faux pas or standouts were found.
Hash Trash: GM tried to give away a baseball cap and promptly announced that he might keep it next week…seems it is from his favorite restaurant.
Hash Crash: The Wizard shyly came to the ice. Claimed he was in a queue?? Waiting for a movie?? And someone pushed him. Hot Hope also claimed the same thing…maybe they pushed each other?
Hares called to the Ice: V.V, Two Time and Who the Duck am I? made themselves comfortable on the ice. Around the circle were overheard comments: "my feet got wet and muddy, excellent run". GI Joe said his feet didn’t get wet “I can walk on water” Tell his wife the next time she tells him to take out the garbage. Other comments: “dirty, twists and turns” “VV told the truth for the first time ever” “enjoyed the tapioca run” “fantastic A-site” “cheese for snacks makes any run a winner.” the run was “moist not wet”
Raffle: Tickets were sold by star saleswoman Leg Over and the raffle was called by Hot Hope who it seems might need some new glasses…”is that an 8 or a 9?” Many missing numbers today or was HH just misreading them?
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Testicles (One ball) grabbed the Sangsom.
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Norwegian runner Linda won the wine.
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Cheap Cheap grabbed the cooler after some confusion
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The Wizard took the laundry detergent so he can finally wash his collection of hash shirts
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JP the virgin won the ever coveted can of cookies
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Dragon emerged from the depths to ask should I take the beer or the tea? Fleece lifter suggested the tea but she never listens to him.
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Drag Queen was stuck with the tea. “What is this? Is there something inside?”
Fattus Maximus sort of led a song after he woke up.
RA Emperor Air Head took the circle with his trustworthy cardboard I-Pad. Of course he put the hares on the ice. He reminded us that VV is the “Keith Richards of hashing” EA discovered that when setting the trail, VV always had Who the D am I? go first so he could discover the bees and whatever else. “Pit vipers always bite third person”..who was that? Being in a generous mood the Emperor said “Everyone had a great time…they thought of everything, perfect team and A-site.”
Dick family members were next: Papa Dick aka Limp Dick and Don’t call me Dick were called in. The Emperor said that due to numerous complaints from the ladies he was rescinding Papa Dick’s name change and he was renamed to Limp Dick…but not sure he used water so was it official?
Finally, new member Jeff was called to the ice. Emperor Airhead was somewhat at a loss about how to name him after 3 weeks of getting almost no info on him. EA was even seen asking the girls at the Tahitian Queen what they thought between lap dances. Some names like Nowhere Man or Missing Personality were suggested. Nobody in the circle except the old farts knew that Beatles song reference even after EA treated us to some verses. Emperor complained that there were no witty or intelligent people in the circle. The group overwhelmingly settled on Freddy Kruger..there is some resemblance.
GM took over again and called in some runners for recognitions…shirts coming later I guess.
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Two Times 80 hared runs
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Car Licker 100 runs
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Dragon who was almost finished with her raffle beer 100 runs
Congrats to one and all.
RA Wizard took over the circle. Mae the Norwegian virgin was invited to the ice and asked to invite one of her parents and she picked Dad but the Wiz said pick again. Mom LInda who doesn't remember her hash name but does know her registration number joined her daughter. She was politely reminded of multiple violations of the no fanny packs or hats in the circle. Switzerland virgin JP joined them and was reminded that this was the best fun you can get in Pattaya for 400 baht…considering his recent raffle win. I think Wizard’s math is off.
Visitors and returners called to the ice: Pookie Merah from Kalimantan who claimed his name means Red Pu**y said he was here for sex, drugs and rock and roll…the Wizard promised him some rock and roll at the Kubla but he was on his own for the rest. Chris from Belgium rode the bucket for lying to the Wiz about how many times he had been here. Rule #1 Don’t embarrass the Wizard. Deep Shit brought his hat and bag into the circle and was questioned about the suspicious wet stains on his pants. Gold Coast seemed a bit edgy so the Wizard left him alone.
Bull Ringer was called to the ice about his coming in at almost the end of the 2nd circle last week. He claimed he was having “a chat with a chap” and then took a “shortcut” The Wizard said that there is where he went wrong: “thinking” He was also questioned about his phone ringing during the first circle and not responding to multiple cries of Bull Ringer. I guess he thought it was someone else named Bull Ringer.
Mayo Queen lost his glasses case as the baht bus was circling. Luckily his glasses were not in it.
Jean Pierre aka JP lost his phone…or did he? After causing mild panic he found it in his bag. How did it get there?
Mr. Bean was taken to task for discovering a urinal next to VV’s new truck. It did not appear to need a washing. Mr. Bean said I thought I could pee anywhere. Just ask Fattus Maximus about that.
It was time for the Wanker of the Week. After much consideration, the hashers took pity on BR and voted JP with the wooden spoon. JP is the first Virgin to win WOTW so will go down in PH3 history when someone writes it.
Hares sang a song… VV and Two Times opted for the ice as usual and Who the Duck Am I? did the honors with the famous? “Balls to your partner” song.
RA The Wizard led the final down down and hash song.
The On-On bar was the famous Kubla Bar. Entertainment by the bar owner in the form of singing was promised and delivered. Is he trying to drive customers away?
On-on until next week Diaper Sniper.